My Dear Jenn

I'm wearing my emotions for the world to see.

2012-02-08T23:12:00.001-06:00

You can even see it in my eye. No really. I was just trying to take some random picture for Instagram and I can literally see my emotions in my eye. I wasn't sad that day. Actually, I was quite happy. We just took my son and nephew on a walk down to the local Mickey D's near our house and they were playing with the other kids. I was very entertained by these boys and their interactions. I thought I was fine. I'm not fine. For the past week and a half, I've been so emotional. I mean, really lately, when have I not been? I'm a mess. I don't even know how Michael deals with me half the time. I get eager to go to work, to get a break but then can't stop thinking most of the time I'm there. Always on the verge of crying. I had a good cry today after the boys threw all my clean clothes out, that I washed yesterday, onto the floor. But it wasn't the cry I needed. I need this:

I know some of you might be wondering why I even need to cry. To have that good cry if I'm happy. I don't know if any of you have ever been through a divorce but mine hasn't been so easy. Sure, the communication has been easy and all of that but the thought that I'm wiping everything I've worked hard for & built & completely starting over kills me. I mean, half the time I wonder why I even did it for. All the questions and doubts about anything and everything run through my head constantly. It's never ending. The closer it gets to my ex's arrival home, the worse it gets. I'm just tired of being a mess. I knew this year would be life changing but shit, give a girl a break. I don't even remember the last time I had a tear forming laugh. I love those kinds of laughs. Sure, I laugh but I want to really feel it. I want to feel everything again. I feel like I can't go past a level of emotion or something. Numb? You ever see V for Vendetta? Remember how she couldn't really feel? Then remember how she felt out in that rain (pictured above)? (Watch the whole scene here but I suggest watching the movie if you haven't) I want that. I need it. But damn, I'm scared of it. I don't remember the last time I felt anything and everything in that moment, so hard like she did in that movie. I think we all need to feel like that from time to time. To feel vulnerable, scared, upset & lost. That one moment, that happens once in a blue moon, where you genuinely feel alive. When is the last time you felt truly alive?

5 New Blogs to Love (Feb Edition)

2012-02-03T12:22:00.002-06:00

Since this month is the month of love & I haven't done one of these in awhile, I thought I'd spread the love on a few of my new favorite blogs. Check out my past favorites posts here: 5 New Blogs to Love | My Youtube Favorites

1.) Bobbi from Today I'm Bobbi

This is Bobbi. She's awesome. She is in a long distance relationship with her love in Auckland and will eventually be leaving the US :/ Her blog documents her travels and photography and daily life. She also does design work and is currently offering adorable prints for everyone to have. She also has great fashion sense :)

2.) Kendi from The Single Mom(oirs)

Say hi to Kendra. She was a previous military spouse as well and is leading the life of a single mom. Sound familiar? I was instantly struck by how similar we were when I stumbled across her blog. Her son is adorable and my son thought the birthday cake popcorn she posted about was a hit! She also does design work and offers up a few freebies, one of which I used in my upcoming design work on my business cards for the Texas Style Council Conference.

3.) Hannah from 17in Heart

This is Hannah. I am one of her newest stalkers. A friend of mine introduced me to her awhile back but I just recently stumbled upon her again. She is a photographer and designer and has great fashion sense. She also has yummy recipes all over her blog. We have a lot of the same interests and I love reading every new posts that she jots up.

4.) Jess from IROCKSOWHAT

This is Jess. She's a mommy of one and a military wife. Generally, I'm not into military wife blogs anymore because of my circumstances but she reminds me so much of myself. Not just that but you wouldn't know she was married to a military member anymore because that's not what her blog is about. It's about her. Her son and her designs take center stage on her blog. I love her blog so much, that I currently sponsor it. She offers free prints but does awesome headers as well for a small fee if you ever want to go take a look :) You'll love her, I PROMISE. She's very involved with her readers as well, no matter how much her blog has grown.

5.) Lula from Lulapalooza

No words are needed for Lula's blog. I just vicariously live through her. She's awesome.

The reality of February & March.

2012-02-02T00:49:00.001-06:00

These next two months are going to be overwhelming. Let me see if I can break it down to you guys on what I'll be dealing with:

Finding a new job: While I enjoy working for the company that I work for, part time won't pay the bills & I'm pretty sure they're not looking for full time either. I want to say though, that I am thankful to have a job. Especially one that is currently flexible, which is what I need at this very moment. However, I have to move onward pretty soon and am going to hate when/if I say goodbye :/

Getting a vehicle: I've never owned my own vehicle. Once the end of this month is over, it's going to be a necessity. The BF and I do have an option in the vehicle department though. A borrowing option until we can get our own. We'll take what we can get until then.

Our lease is ending: The time is coming to an end with our current apartment. Though we are not on the lease itself, rather dwellers, it might making leave easier and much sooner than expected. I'm ready to get out of this over-priced tiny living space. Massive cleaning will be coming soon. Cleaning and packing. The most annoying thing ever.

Finding a new place: This is going to be a tough one. Okay, maybe tough, maybe not. Depends on the cosmos. I've found some homes in our price range and hopefully we will have something set by the end of the month. If not, we'll still have a place to stay thanks to my wonderful parents who have offered us a place to live if need be. Wish us luck!

Preparing/Attending Texas Style Council Blog Conference: Have I mentioned how excited I am about this? I am planning to attend with Jessica, who I use to be neighbors with when we were kids and we went to the same school throughout our adolescent years. They want you to bring business cards for networking and raffles. At first, I thought it was a dumb idea...UNTIL I happened to design my own and I am IN LOVE with them. I can't wait to hand them out! Plus it will keep me semi-distracted from the final thing I'm not looking forward to...

Saying goodbye to my baby boy: Let me first say how sad and gut wrenching this thought is to me. I will have to say a temporary goodbye to my womb baby for 4-5 months so that he can spend time with his father, upon his return from his deployment. I honestly don't know how I'm going to handle this. Not only did I grow this baby in my belly, fall in love with him and commit my being to his survival, I have spent every waking moment with him, every day for the past 4 1/2 years. The longest I've gone without him is a weekend. I am his mother. There is no feeling like that between a mother and child, especially one that has been there with you every, single, day. I am his primary caregiver. Will he forget me? Will he change? There are so many questions that run through my mind when I think about this. I try to be positive. It will give me a chance to settle down (house wise), go to school & take care of business while he is away but damn, I want him with me. Selfish? Maybe. Do I care. No. I can feel this way. At least I'm not one of those crazy ex's that go crazy when it comes to their kids seeing the other parent. I want my child to have a bond with his father and to spend time with him. Especially, since I've heard news that his father chose and will be stationed in another OCONUS location in the next year to come. More distance in between them. Not what I wanted but I can't make his father do anything. I just have to be the best mother I can be and encourage their bond to grow & develop no matter how far they are or no matter the circumstances. I hope I get the strength to be away from my angel for such a long period of time. It's going to wreck my nerves not to wake up to his face or help to keep him safe on the daily. I've already set aside money to see him while he is away. Trust me, I'll make that flight & pay that money just to see him for a few days. You better believe that. Distance and $$ will never keep me away from my son :) He is my #1 priority and the main dude in my life. All I know, is while he is gone, nothing, absolutely nothing will be the same.

So there you have it. If I seem out of it or not as responsive as usual for the next few months, you'll know why. Have any of you gone through similar experiences or have any advice? I'd love to hear it. It would really help.

*sigh* Anyway, before I go, I want to say hello to my new followers. You have not gone unseen, I promise. It will take me some time to get to know you with what's going on in my life but we'll chit chat before you know it. If you'd like, send me an email or tweet. I'd love to get to know you.

Fashionably Late (Eshakti review)

2012-01-30T18:33:00.004-06:00

A month ago, Eshakti.com contacted me & asked me if I would be willing to write a review for them. Because I'm always eager to give a review and I mean really, who doesn't love free stuff, I said yes. Since it was pretty cold outside, I opted for a jacket. Following the size chart, I went up a size (to 6 instead of 4) because I figured I'd need the extra room for layers. Hello, I lived in Alaska for almost two years! I sent off the request and waited to hear back from them, hoping they wouldn't decline it because I chose something expensive. A week later, I received an email saying they took all their jackets off the website because their standards for jackets had changed. I was pretty bummed out to say the least, but Eshakti promised to send me the jacket I chose as soon as it fit the new guidelines. They asked me to pick something else in return. So, I chose this blue little number here in a size 4. A week later, it arrived at my doorstep. Let me just be honest and say this is the first real dress that I owned, that I DIDN'T buy at a Ross price. At first glance, it appeared to be too long. I was even convinced it was too long on me for a whole month. I wanted to wear it to my cousin's wedding but last minute, opted for something else. This dress, however, fits very nicely. The only problem I have with it, is that with my taste, I would prefer a smidge less fabric. It didn't fit quite like I'd hoped but it fits well, none the less. I kind of prefer form fitting dresses and it's been awhile since I wore one that flows. The fabric itself, felt wonderful.

It did not feel cheap at all. It felt like I bought it from the womens department at Macy's, if that makes sense. I was quite surprised. I half expected some Forever 21 type fabric. I decided to pair it up with a necklace that I won from No Model Lady a few giveaways back, a purse I got for Christmas from Target (my favorite purse, btw) and some black heels I got from Ross. I love the tie that is at the very top of the dress. It adds a bit of European pizzaz.

What is that on my arm? Why, it is the jacket that they promised! I was quite surprised to see it turn up at my home a few weeks later. I discovered, however, that long peacoats don't really look so awesome on shorter girls (I'm barely 5'3). But I wore it out anyway and took a couple of pictures as well. The quality of the coat was excellent. The BF and I took these pictures today & it was 50 degrees out and windy. I didn't feel cold, at all. Didn't feel one gust of air go through my body where the coat was. I also would like to note, that I should have gotten a size 4 instead of a 6. The item is made of wool, so I could shrink it, but I'd rather not. I'm afraid it would ruin the quality. If I had to choose again, I'd choose this very pretty teal ottoman jacket. Which is 60% off by the way.

There is good news though! Eshakti accidentally sent me 2 of the same coat, in the same size and I'm giving one away to you guys! It's a size 6, which according to their size chart, is BUST: 35 WAIST: 28 & HIPS: 38. If that sounds like you & you comment on this entry, just let me know that you'd like to have it as yours. That's all. I don't need you guys to tweet it, or blog it or share this post in order to win this $119 dollar coat. I want to really give it to one of you guys.

I'd really like to thank my awesome BF. He took the time out to take all these pictures for me. He took some previous pictures that I had on my page, so I knew they would come out well. He's not a professional but he does have a good eye. We even stopped mid-shoot and took one of those cheesy shadow heart pictures:

We're 26 year old teenagers and that's what we do. We also stumble across disgusting things in our shoot location and make jokes about them:

Oh, I also wanted to add that Eshakti.com also does custom styling and sizing. I had the choice to do it but thought choosing the standard sizes would be a better way to go. At first glance of the website a month ago, I wasn't sure about the clothes. They had a few pieces that I liked but I didn't think any of them yelled out at me. Once they put up their new jackets, a few screamed BUY ME and looking at it now, it seems like their design/style choices are sooo much better. I want to also add that though Eshakti.com sent these items to me, free of charge, this review is 100% completely honest and was not swayed by any compensation. They wanted an honest review & that's what I've given.

Would I recommend Eshakti to a friend? Yes, I would. I truly believe the two pieces I have, are quality items & customer service was quick and responsive when I spoke to them through email. Unsure if you want to buy anything through Eshakti? Check out No Model Lady's review of them as well. Most of their designs have a bit of a mod cloth/thrift store/ vintage look to them (great quality) but they have a few modern pieces in there as well. Go check it out and thanks for stopping by! **The two items that I am modeling from Eshakti are no longer on the website but there are many other cute dresses and jackets, if you'd like to check them out :)

The trouble with blogging is...

2012-01-27T15:56:00.001-06:00

Right before I started to write this, I went to my blog to find my old post similar to this. And do you notice anything? I'm writing this new post a year exactly from the last time I talked about this. That just blew my mind. Last year's post about blogging was about criticism. I'd like to add on to that. This year, I'm going to be talking about: overexposure & privacy.

I've been blogging for almost two years now, publicly. I've documented my move to Alaska and all the fun stuff I did. I've documented my heart wrenching divorce. I'm still documenting it. I'm also documenting my new relationship and my life as a "single" mom. But what am I really doing all of this for? For the sake of being a popular blogger? No. That was never my goal. I blog because I love to blog. I love to share. I remember reading a few blogs recently and so thankful that I wasn't alone in my circumstances or feelings. That there were other people out there going through the same thing as I am. But it might come back to bite me in the ass. Once you throw your life out there on the internet, you can never take it back. Once you throw a picture of your child's face out there, there very well might be someone out there collecting their pictures up for horrible uses. That goes for your pictures as well. People have their fetishes. Someone might very well be stalking you at this exact moment.

It's scary. Here I am just thinking that I'm sharing the details of my life for fun to 350+ people and really, it's readily available to billions. And the bigger you get, the more people have access to you. Do you value your privacy? Whats left that you have of it? Do we even care anymore? I think in a few years, at some point, no one will have privacy. Privacy settings are currently a joke with social media. In a few years, they will be nonexistent. So does privacy even MATTER? Like at all? Should I just not worry about it?

Another thing with blogging that I've come across is at some point, you have the option of collecting sponsors. I know of a few bigger blogs that don't do it but most blogs I know do. Will I? It turns into a lot of upkeep, for this hobby I love. I've taken so much time to think about this and am still thinking about it. Will collecting sponsors make me a sell out? I came here for blogging and community. What will happen if I ever get too big? Will I change? Will I even have time to be a blogger anymore? I don't even feel like I have a voice to be honest. And I'd feel like a fraud if I charged at this point. However, blogging does take up a bit of my real life time and I barely have any real life time to spare. I work, sleep, take care of my son & plan for the future which is incredibly exhausting. I currently haven't had the time to expand and reach out, as far as blogging goes. I'd love for my blog to grow. To communicate with others. But I'm scared. I'm scared of my life to be out there even more than it is. So I'm kind of at a cross road.

And when people get big, I've noticed that some of them forget about the little people. I don't want to ever forget about the little people. Ever. I am just like you. I am just a person, blogging about my feelings. Blogging about things that are important to me. Please don't you ever let me forget about everyone else. I'd be so embarrassed.

So what do I do? Even though I'm not okay with being overexposed and putting every detail out there, do I still do it? Because privacy will be nonexistent in the future? And because I enjoy it? Where do you draw the line and what are your future goals with your blog? My only goal is to keep blogging no matter how bad I want to quit. Everything else, is just a future in the making. A few things on FB got me thinking about this today and also Stephanie's Farewell to the blog world that she posted today. It's such a bummer to see people you adore disappear from online. It makes me think that there would be someone out there that would be bummed if I left. Maybe Ill just delete my FB and stick to the blog world and twitter. I need to downsize in social media. I feel like I'm being swarmed. Do you feel like you're being smothered in social media? I think we all need a breather to be honest. It's just starting to get to be too much.

/end ramble.

OUR WEEKEND

2012-01-25T07:00:00.003-06:00

This past Sunday, we traveled an hour away to go to one of the top 5 zoos in the nation. I am an avid zoo fan. While I don't really support keeping animals in captivity like this, I can't help but be grateful that there are places like these where we can observe them. When I was younger, I wanted to be a zoologist. It was only recently that I discovered that zoologists go to school for a very long time to make just the smallest amount of money. Probably around the amount that a teacher makes. I don't know about you guys but I don't want to graduate from 8 years of schooling for a 50,000 a year salary.

However, my love of animals has never died. And my love of the zoo & aquariums will live forever. Since I had one day this weekend off, we planned a zoo trip! I was super excited. I had never been to the Fort Worth Zoo, even though I've lived here so long. So it made me happy that I would experiencing it with my son and significant other, for the first time together. The weather was absolutely perfect. 70 degrees in January? I'll take it. Sure, I'm fearful for what the summer might hold but let's just enjoy this nice Texas winter we are having :)

My son was definitely the tour guide for the day. He held the map the entire time and led us to all the animals. He was really desperate to see the monkeys.

Mike and I fell MADLY in love with Orangutans. Their intelligence is so powerfully mind blowing. It was ridiculous. They were irritated at all the spectators, myself included. You could see how annoyed they were that we were there. One climbed to the ground and laid face down. The other grabbed a potato sack, threw it over its head, slid down the poles, went into the corner of some rocks and turned his back to us. The potato sack was even over his head to help him hide. At one point, he even turned around, saw we were still there and shook his head. It was INTENSE. I really thought Planet of the Apes was about to go down.

Anyone else in love with this primate? I even thought about getting a tattoo of an Orangutan on me afterward. And yes, I made Michael watch Planet of the Apes with me the next day. I'm obsessed.

And I'm just not in the mood to overload you guys with pictures of animals you've already seen before. To be completely honest, I didn't take too many pictures. I really was just enjoying my time with my family for the most part. After the zoo, we went to Chuy's to eat and drove along the Trinity River. And I also noticed how many women wore cowboy boots there (Fort Worth) compared to Dallas. I mean, I wore mine just because but didn't realize how well I would blend in!

I'm glad we had a great time there. Especially Mike. I'm trying to slowly but surely convince him that Texas is awesome. Because I swear, if I hear how wonderful Washington is one more time, I'm going to throw him over the balcony. This boy is something else. If it's one thing that he should learn, it's that you should never challenge a Texan's pride :)

I hope you all had a fabulous weekend! And if you haven't already, check out the giveaway (Thanks to The Shine Project) on the top right sidebar. It ends Jan 27th! And hello to all of my new readers! I can't wait to get to know you all :)

Shine Project Giveaway + Dallas Shine Event!

2012-01-20T21:09:00.003-06:00

Today's giveaway is from The Shine Project. Ashley created The Shine Project to motivate others to go after their goals, and spread their light to others. Money from each necklace and shirt sold goes into a scholarship fund to help inner city high school students go to college. You can read more about that HERE.

Each necklace is handmade, and you can add personalized charms to them that represent a significant date or initials.

Here's a video that shows more about the SHINE mission:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqQ-4pziyWQ&feature=player_embedded

The Shine Project is going on the road this year to different cities

to inspire people to make a change. On February 25th, shine will come to Dallas
to make blankets for the homeless. I'll be there!

If you live in the DFW area & plan to go, you can RSVP HERE

San Diego, Salt Lake City, Phoenix, LA, and Vegas are also on the list!

Email Ashley at Ashley.theshineproject@gmail.com if you want to get involved!

Today's giveaway winner will receive a SHINE necklace.

And ALL of you will receive 10% off of your total order!

Go HERE to see more shine necklaces and order information.
In your email order, write SHINE10 for your code.

Here's how to enter (Leave a comment for each!):

1. Comment below who you'd give a shine necklace to in your life

For extra entries:

2. Follow The Shine Project blog HERE

3. Like The Shine Project on FB HERE

A winner will be chosen, a week from now, on the 27th of Jan! Good luck!!

How to dress your little man

2012-01-11T06:00:00.004-06:00

In the near future (5-7 year plan), my family and I are planning to eventually end up on the West coast. Do I want to leave Texas? Hell no, I don't. I'm a southern girl all the way. My boo (yes, I call him that), however, is from the North West. Which means we had to come to some sort of compromise. I won't go in to detail, in order not to jinx us, but we're meeting somewhere in the middle. In preparation for this, the man and I dressed superbaby up, hipster style.

I've got to be honest. He looks fantastic as a mini hipster. He sports everything so well. Not only does he wear this well but he dresses himself pretty awesome too. I'm not too sure what he is wearing but I do know the boots are Polo: c/o of his Dad and beanie is a dollar one from Wally World. I'd tell you the rest but I'm not in the mood to get out of bed and dig through my sons drawers and closet. Yea, I'm lazy. I'm so lazy that I meant to tell you that I took these pictures in November. I planned this post a long time ago but never got a chance to write it, until now. It's embarrassing to be a procrastinator sometimes. I still haven't finished up my travel series! Anyway, I think I should make a few recurring posts about my son's fashion. *lightbulb* Blog idea! Oh and sorry for the big watermark. My son is so cute that I can't have people stealing his pics and claiming them as their own! So what do you think? Does the outfit suit him? And seriously, we need to start a toddler blog fashion trend. Because really, there is more to toddler fashion than t-shirt and jeans. Am I right?!

Since the dust has settled...

2012-01-02T12:30:00.005-06:00

I can tell you one thing that has most definitely changed for me since I was 18. The seriousness of going to work. I now take work incredibly seriously. On days that I don't want to work, I don't just call in. I use call in's for absolutely necessary reasons. I plan weeks ahead as much as possible to try to give my shift away. I talk with my bosses if something comes up. On sick days, I now pull myself out of bed and get ready for the long day ahead. There is no slacking. I went to work the whole week before Christmas sick. I kept slowly losing my voice. I had to work the night of Thanksgiving and I had to work on Christmas Eve. Work literally feels non stop and my body can feel it. It crumbled the week before Christmas but I kept chugging. I missed my son a lot. So Christmas Eve day came and I worked from morning until 3. I got off work, headed home and gave my son big ole hugs and kisses (like usual) and we got ready to go over to my Aunt's house for our Christmas Eve gathering.

We had tamales for our Christmas Eve gathering. Home made tamales that my family made. It was delicious and I had such a good time taking a break and celebrating the holidays with my son. He was so happy that Christmas time was here.

The next morning, my son was so surprised to find toys under the tree. I didn't bathe my son with toys this year and I'm pretty happy about that. I actually only bought him two toys and a pair of shoes. He got the rest from his family members. Less I have to spend! I'm so HAPPY that he loves his shoes. It reminds him of his favorite group/song they sing and he can't get enough of them.

The day after Christmas, I went back to work. And let me say, I am very grateful to have a job and that they asked me to stay. Sure I'm only pulling part time hours and might look for a second job just in case but I am still grateful. I can't stress this enough. Anyway, a few days after Christmas, my mother got a hold of some free Six Flags Holiday in the Park tickets. We swooped up the kids and traveled to Arlington. The boys had never been, so I was ecstatic that they seemed to be having such a wonderful time!

For NEW YEARS, we went to a wedding. I wish I could say that I got a lot of pictures but I didn't. I was too busy catching up with family, eating food, chasing kids and being tortured in my heels. My son looked awesome by the way. He looked better than a Mormon missionary that night!

I hope your holidays were filled with joy and that your New Years Eve was a blast. Here is to the New Year! Lots of change is ahead, especially for this girl. Oh and ONE MORE thing:

The Man of The Hour.

2011-12-16T12:34:00.006-06:00

Here he is!!! Doesn't he just have the prettiest smile?! What? You thought I'd show you his face? Aww shoot, you caught me. I already did here. And before I go any further with this post, I'd like you all to take note that it wasn't until very recently where our friendship actually became a romantic relationship. Nothing to do with the dissolution of my marriage. Just wanted to make that clear. Now, to continue. This is Mike. Well, Mike to everyone else but Michael to me. He's my Egyptian/Spanish, tattooed, pierced lips, gauged eared, astronomy loving boyfriend. Ew, I hate that word. My significant other. Like I said previously, we met in AIT. He actually got me in trouble on my first day as a class leader. The first thing he ever said to me was "I'm sorry" as we were both on the ground, doing push ups together cause he decided to be a funny guy. The first thing we both thought about each other when seeing each other for the first time was Me: What the *bleep* is he staring at & Him: What the *bleep* is her problem. Romantical, right? Well somehow, we started "talking" while in AIT and that flourished. I have many funny stories that I'd like to share about that but we'll save that for a later post. On our last day of AIT as we all headed home, I remember shouting out the window to him because he was leaving. Kind of fairytale-ish. Anyway, I wanted to drop everything and move up to be with him & have a change of scenery but he had so much bad stuff going on in his life, that it couldn't happen. And slowly we dissolved. Not sure if we ever really broke up either. However, we had been friends ever since. And one of those where there really was NO romantic feelings whatsoever. A genuine deep friendship that we shared over time. 7 years time to be exact. And he is so incredibly strong. I have never met someone with such a tough, ridiculously unfair life as he has lived. All he seemed to ever want was to be happy and loved and got the worse in return.

As you MIGHT know, when my ex was home on R&R with my son, family and the girl he is dating, I decided to take off. You think I wanted to dwell on THAT situation? No thanks. So I flew off to Seattle in chance of a break with all the madness going on around me. It was like my family couldn't just leave me alone about my ex and I not being together anymore. I needed a breather and lots of sleep. Which I got, plus some amazing company with Michael.

It's completely crazy that he's a part of my life, the way he is now. You never think you're going to be romantically connected ever again because you never think of the person that way. But BAM it happens. So my visit with him just reaffirmed exactly how I was feeling. Sure there has been a little bit of ups and downs in the beginning because we were both going through some crazy stuff in our lives and didn't know how to handle it. But the fact that we are still making it through, amazes me. His life was bumpy at the same time mine just hit some shitty turbulence and we still somehow managed to hold hands the entire time. And seriously guys, I don't know how he could stand me being so emotional. He is so use to me being his best friend from Texas, Jennifer. Actually, let's not lie. He could only stand it to an extent. Then he e-slapped me to snap the heck out of it if I got too crazy.

And lucky for us, he got to come to Texas to visit again during Halloween :) Boy did I need it. It's so refreshing to see his face. He has been out in the real world so long and I've been sheltered in my stay at home mom life, he really helps me see my reality. While he was down, I got a job & accomplished a lot of things. Plus, I spent a lot of time with him and my son has always had a soft spot in his heart for Michael as well.

And you know what's even better about Michael? Not ONLY does he like taking pictures with me or me taking pictures of him, he appreciates them. He likes photography himself, which is awesome. And he likes when I take random photos of him just as much as I love random photos of myself.

And he has giant hands compared to mine that make me feel super safe. Can't wait to be near him again. Hopefully, that is soon because I can't stand long distance relationships any longer. The Army numbed me to that.

I could go on and on but I'm sure I'll just save all the tidbits I want to talk about for future posts. I already write novels as it is. I'm lucky you guys even read all of it! Thanks for stopping in to read about the man in my life! I've really appreciated all of your support and kind words. You have no idea.

Fun Fact: Michael took the picture of me that's on the sidebar on my blog, against the bricks :) I know, super awesome!

Squeeze machines, Panic attacks and Changes.

2011-12-15T12:49:00.003-06:00

Oh my goodness you guys! Due to a surprising turn of events that happened via Facebook over the weekend, I feel I can finally introduce you to the man in my life. Weeks ago, I had a horrible dream that my blog would be used against me in my divorce, so I have been incredibly iffy about posting anything that has to do with my new life here. Not that I think my ex is that vicious but this is the one place that I try to be honest and I'd hate for my honesty to be used against me. I'm sure he or his current girlfriend know of my blog address. I mean, I did make this blog when he and I were together.

Right now, I want to be honest about a few nights ago.

I was lying in bed, having a very emotional night. It was one of those nights, when you're getting a divorce, where you wonder what you are doing, why you're doing it and all you want to do is go back home. And then it hits you. You don't have a home to go back to. You're even currently in a temporary dwelling. You and your son are nomads and have to move out in 2 1/2 months. And even though you were promised the income tax check to help you move on with your life, a few days ago you also realize that there might be a possibility that you don't receive anything this year because your ex makes way too much money. (I'm sure you know now that YOU refers to ME at this point lol). It's such a surreal feeling to actually know you don't have anything anymore. That your foundation had been stripped. And it freaked me the hell out. I cried hysterically. All of my emotions fell out into the forms of tears all over my pillows. I couldn't think straight. I started thinking things that I never thought I would. About going back. Forcing myself to make it work. I just wanted to feel safe and secure because I had never been this scared before in my life. Not even when I was in basic training, not even when I was giving birth. I had never felt this feeling before. And I did this. I chose this path. Man you guys, do not get a divorce unless its really what you want because what follows after is quite terrible but life changing. And it doesn't hit you until its almost time for you to be on your own. You had built this whole life then chose to rip it down and start over. You no longer have the funds you had, you lose family etc. It's horrible and to be honest I've suffered quite silently.

So I laid there, having one of the worst panic attacks I'd ever had in my entire life. I clung on to my sons Daddy Doll (because it was in the vicinity and I needed something with more cushion to press my chest into), preached to God some things I'm not sure I even believed myself and willed it. Have you ever willed something? Where you want it so bad you can feel your body pushing towards it with all its might? All this pressure? Well that's what I did. I willed what I asked for. And all of a sudden, I felt the most calming pressure push against my body. A feeling I had never felt before. Have you ever heard of Temple Grandins squeeze machine?

Well if not, it's a machine that was made by an Autistic professor to help her calm down when she had anxiety or panic attacks. (By the way, if you haven't seen the Temple Grandin movie featuring Claire Danes, you should). Anyway, I discovered after watching the movie, that I too reacted to hugs that are somewhat similar to squeeze machines pressures. And that's exactly what I felt at the end of the panic attack. Pressure. And a sensation that everything will be alright. And I had become so calm, that I drifted off to sleep. When I woke up, I stumbled upon something via Facebook that was the complete opposite of what I asked for during the panic attack. As a matter of fact, it even confirmed that there was no going back. And I was okay with that. And I felt the biggest sigh of relief that I no longer needed to hide anything about my life anymore on here.

And then I got the sweetest text message, immediately after this discovery, from the man in my life. And it reaffirmed that I was going to be okay and my future is incredibly bright. So! Expect a new post tomorrow. Particularly expect an introduction post ;) See you then!

Oh btw, I have alerted the winner of the previous giveaway already! Thanks for those who joined in!

Christmas Cheer! (Giveaway!)

2011-12-07T04:00:00.016-06:00

I'll admit it, I've been Oscar the Grouch for the past few weeks. I hate my hair. I hate my body. I hate my job (oh yeah, forgot to tell you guys I got one). Blah blah blah. The man in my life was super grouchy because of some sad things that had come up in his life (oh yeah, probably should introduce him). Everything was kind of crappy. Until a few days ago, when the Christmas spirit started to sneak into my life. Some younger girl showed up at my work saying she loved my hair (no matter how frizzy and unruly I thought it was). The customers seem so much nicer and strangers walk up to me to tell me Happy Holidays. We also put up our Christmas tree tonight and some lights around the porch. I even listened to some Christmas tunes as well. Sure I'm broke and hate sleeping in my bed alone at night but I have it pretty lucky compared to most who have been through my situation. So! When my friend Lauren (longtime friend) offered to do a giveaway to my readers, how could I resist?

Totally us, in our prime. We're almost 30 year olds after all! Isn't she gah-geous?!

It has been a long time since I've done one after all. Her and I have been Photoshop/HTML (real life as well) buddies forever. And she is creating the cutest little graphics lately. Look at this one of her and her husband:

And how about this one:

She's even turned her and her husband into Tom&Jerry:

And me into a cat:

You can check out more on her Facebook Page (Fun With ELL)! I don't think she has all of her awesomeness on her page but trust me, her graphics are adorable. And her talent won't stop growing.

Her sweet self is offering one of my readers a free graphic! Whether it be for your blog, an invitation or just a holiday graphic to send to your friends and families! You can either get a personalized graphic (includes up to two people and one pet in a scene of your choice) or a portrait graphic (It includes one person or pet and a solid color background.). These are uniquely created and there will not be one design ever the same. Your own unique graphic you can share, print or have placed on a variety sort of items. Wouldn't it look great on Christmas cards? Especially if you have loved ones overseas/far away and can't get a family photo together? Totally, right? Well here is your chance to enter for your free graphic:)

All I ask is that you are a follower of this blog. Write a comment out saying so. Here is how you can obtain additional entries:

Go and Like Fun with ELL on Facebook
Tweet about this giveaway! Check out @mydearjenn's super adorable Christmas graphic giveaway on her blog! www.mydearjenn.com courtesy of http://www.facebook.com/ElleFunnell
You can also blog about the giveaway

If you don't any of the above, leave a comment saying so, so that your additional entry will be accounted for. A winner will be chosen at 9pm, Central Time, on December 13th. Goodluck!

What I've learned: Don't Forget to Touch Your Spouse/Partner

2011-11-26T15:14:00.005-06:00

Before I get into this topic, I'd like to put out a disclaimer. I am not some certified therapist. I didn't go to school to be a journalist and probably write some pretty horrible blog entries. I am just a woman who is separated from her husband and in the proceedings of a divorce. You can take my advice with a grain of salt or you can think of it as wisdom from someone who has experienced such things. This entry will mainly be written from personal experience and I hope it reaches out to those who need it. Feel free to disagree as well.

One thing I've learned from my marriage: Don't forget to touch your husband

Today I woke up and stumbled upon a few articles this morning about putting your husband and/or yourself (depending on circumstance) first before your children. At first the articles made me angry. Well lets be honest here. The husband one made me angry first. Which is understandable. I just didn't understand the concept of putting your spouse before your children. But after a few hours of thinking about it, I became incredibly upset. I had already known one of the root causes of my impending divorce between my husband and I. We didn't put our relationship first. My husbands list went like this: Job first, son second, own desires third and relationship last. My list looked like this: My son first, my job second (SAHM), my relationship third and my own desires last. Doesn't even matter how different our list was and where we ranked with each other. What matters is that we were never first with each other. The key to having a wonderful family is to have a solid marriage. Without a marriage, the foundation to a family wouldn't even exist. Which is why it is so utterly important to put each other first.

My husband and I went on a marriage retreat (which are provided free by the Army) and we learned about the Five Love Languages (you can take the quizzes here). Have you ever heard of that book? Apparently his was Acts of Service and mine was Physical Touch/Quality Time. That could not be more true and boy did we neglect the hell out of each others love languages. It makes me sick to my stomach to think this could have all been prevented by putting our relationship first. Maybe our upbringing had something to do with not recognizing the signs, which reiterates the importance of raising your children in a family where the parents are incredibly affectionate and make their relationship a priority. My husband and I were both raised in single parent homes. My mother never had a solid relationship after my father and I never truly felt affection from her like my little body needed, I suppose. I cannot be definite of the details of his upbringing but I do know that I can see why his love language was Acts of Service.

Of course, you never really see that you're neglecting each other. My husband worked a tough job in a tough climate that demanded so much from his life. I never got to see him as much as I could and when I did, there was always the possibility of him being stripped away from our personal time for something else. And it's not like he could turn off his phone because he had a rough day. The military would come to him if he didn't answer. We could never feel settled. And because of this, I immersed myself into my son and any family time we had. At the end of the day we would be so mentally exhausted, we never really touched each other and all we craved was quiet time. His quiet time was on his video game and mine was on the computer. By the time we had any time to touch each other, we were so exhausted that falling asleep was the better option.

You MUST make time for your relationship and realize the importance of putting it first. If you do not put it first, it WILL fall apart. My friend Miranda said recently to me, "Kids deserve to be number one when it comes to their health and safety, but I believe a big part of raising good kids is showing them what it's like to be in a healthy loving relationship and showing them how to be an individual. If you put the kids first in everything, they are really missing out on those key lessons."

When I say that you need to put your husband first, what I'm really trying to say is this-sh*t-is-so-damn-important-if-you-want-to-stay-together. I cannot express the utter regret I have for not making it so important and a key element in my life and my marriage. I could cry but I am all cried out and I would be sad but I'm past the dwelling stage of this process. I just feel like I just discovered a pot of gold that I'll be taking along with me through my next solid relationship (which Ill get to talking about at a later date).

Now before those who disagree get any more butt hurt, let me talk about something else. I teach my son the importance of sharing. Sharing his time and sharing his toys. Now why don't you share yourself? Do you think it's healthy that give all of yourself to your child/children? Even giving up your dreams and desires for your child or even your family as whole? Children do not need to feel that they are the only thing in their mothers life. It would make me feel horrible if I knew that my mother gave up her hopes and dreams to sacrifice everything for her children and barely had a life outside of us. Because guess what? These children that you've raised and sacrificed everything for will eventually leave you. That is a no brainer. They will leave. And what will you be left with when they go? Hopefully you will have a wonderful relationship with your spouse/partner. Hopefully that foundation will still be there. And just as solid as ever.

So if you get a chance, take a look at the following articles/blog entries I came across that stirred this topic in my brain this morning: 1/2/3

Your marriage came first. Don't let your marriage become an afterthought. Take the time out today to turn it around. Nobody said to stop loving your children. It's just time you put more love into your husband and your marriage if you don't already. Your marriage is the foundation to your family after all. There is NOTHING better than seeing a family where the husband and wife are clearly in love. And if I were a child, there would be nothing better than seeing my parents in love. Clearly and affectionately in love.

Now from here I have to ask myself, What about now? What kind of affect will this have on my next marriage? Especially with my child. Will my child be affected that my affection is with my new spouse rather than his father? Did any of you grow up in a home where your parent was with someone else and incredibly affectionate or clearly in love with them? How did it make you feel that they couldn't work it out with your other parent but are working it out with this other person? I'd love to hear from you guys as well to get some insight. My mother was never in one of those openly affectionate relationships with anyone so I never got to experience having a lifelong step parent with my main caregiver. How do you feel about these articles or this topic? I'd love to hear everyone's opinions, as long as they are constructive and not hasty. Do you think there is a badge of honor with American women, like author Esther Perel has said, where women do not prioritize themselves or their marriage but rather to always put the children first? Are you one of these women? I'd love to hear your feedback!

Gelato and Bloom

2011-11-07T00:00:00.017-06:00

This past weekend, I went into my first clothing boutique. This particular boutique that I visited is located in the dowtown square of Mckinney, Texas. Mckinney has been awarded with so many awards. Best place to live, Best place to raise a family, Safest place to raise a family etc. Its downtown area has so much to offer. Antiques, food, art and clothing. Previously, before I moved away, I had been to this downtown area one or two times. At that time, it wasn't overcrowded with stores. I really wanted to visit again so I took a friend with me this past Saturday. Boy, am I glad we went! We first took a stop at a bistro called La Misha. The service was blah. It took about 20 minutes to get out a club wrap and a gyro with a side salad. Did I mention there was barely a soul there? Maybe it was the fact that we were sitting outside, that they forgot about us? I'm not sure. The waitress (who seemed like the owner) was the one serving us & she seemed friendly. When the food finally came out, I was a bit dissapointed. I spent about 24 bucks on the club wrap and gyro with a side salad (which has no dressing on it) and two waters. It's a bit more than I wanted to pay. The Gyro was good (I had never had one before) but the club wrap had regular deli meat in it. I'm not sure that we will be going back but at least the watress was nice.

Afterward, we stopped right next door at Paciugo Gelato. I had never had gelato either and I was quite impressed at how WONDERFULY smooth and delicious it was!!!! I WILL be going back.

While eating Gelato, we quietly people watched. And then I heard the sounds of what sounded like horse hooves. No way would there be a horse here in the middle of town. But there was. A cop on a horse. I barely get to see cops on horses but when I do, I get a BIT excited.

After that, I finally mustered up the courage to walk across the street. Why would I need courage? Because I have known for MONTHS that Kendi from Kendi Everyday had just opened a boutique in town. Bloom is actually her creation. I read Kendi's blog and was REALLY curious about her location (which I knew was near Austin at the time) when she tweeted about a Goodwill closest to me. What is she doing here, I thought? Then GOMI (which I areading) posted about her opening her own store. Imagine the blow to my chest I got when I opened up the stores webpage just to see how close it was to where I lived?! COME ON! Fate, are you kidding me?! *sigh*

So there I stood, across the street, debating on going into the store. I always thought boutiques were for rich people. Mckinney does harbor people with a tad bit of money, after all. Why would I need to go into a boutique? I shop at department and thrift stores. No way could I afford anything here.

"Eff it! Let's do this! No way she is there anyway!", I told my partner in crime. So there I went, jetting off past the Churchills pub and OMG! *GASP* I literally felt a smack to my face and it wasn't the wind. It was reality. As I speedily walked towards the entrance, Kendi HERSELF was opening the door at the same time. Next thing I knew, I was walking faster PAST the door and not looking back. I stopped to talk to my partner in crime and out of nowhere, felt a gust of wind pushing me INTO the store. And there I was. At the doorway. Not only at the doorway but Kendi's husband had already caught site of me and was opening his mouth with a "HHEEEELLLOOOO" <--imagine this in slow motion.

And then Kendi looked up to say hello. I was so PLEASENTLY surprised at how DOWN TO EARTH they were! I browse around the store a bit (especially the sale rack bc that is always where i head first). The clothes were reasonably priced. It was very much surprising. And they were ADORABLE. I fell in love with a FEW pieces and hope to go back to get them. While heading out the door, I stopped and said hello to Kendi. She was SOOO NICE! We even discussed some thrift stores around the area and talked about my shoes.

I cannot wait to go back. I might have found my new favorite store! If you are in the area, visit this boutique. The clothing is incredibly romantic/adorable and I bet you find at least one thing that you love. Maybe when it isn't so windy, I'll go back and take more pictures of the other stores around the square. But I am going back. For those clothes and definitely for more gelato.

i'm still chugging

2011-11-03T21:32:00.011-05:00

I thought about deleting this blog and starting all over. I have documented so much of my life over the past few years on here, it's kind of hard to reread it all. Rereading past entries reminds me of how real my circumstances still are now. This has been and still is such an amazing battle I am going through. I won't lie. I juggle my options and circumstances on a daily basis. I wake up thinking about my life and the direction it's going. It's been somewhat hindering. This year, I knew, would be challenging. Especially at the start of this deployment. I'm still taking it day by day but let me tell you readers, it is very hard. For some people when they decide on a divorce, they are completely confident. Me? I'm never confident. As a matter of fact, I'm never confident with MANY things. I literally take all my decisions on a day by day basis. It helps me from feeling overwhelmed. And when I get overwhelemed, I turn into a depressed train wreck. That is never a good look or feeling. I'm just trying to keep it together as best as I can. Not only for myself but especially for my son. I wish I could express to you guys what is going on in my life to a t but I can't. I don't like to express anything unless a decision is solid. Or at least, I'm confident in the decision. So for now, let me give you a small update on my life.

I have been applying for jobs. I had an interview a week and a half ago. I thought the interview went well but I didn't get the job :( However, I did apply at one of my favorite stores here this morning and got a call this afternoon. I hope all goes well! I'm crossing my fingers. I need this job for my sanity. It's not just about the money. I'm well taken care of. My bills are still being 100% paid. I still have a roof over my head and food on the table. My husband has even given me money to help me save a little but I haven't been able to save much without my own job. I did take care of a few things for my son so that he could go to school now. So I'm on the verge of finding him a daycare or school. I'm super excited about that and so is our son.

I'll tell you one thing that has been difficult to adjust to though. Living below my means. I use to be so spoiled. I could buy whatever I wanted (not that I did all the time). I budgeted well and was pretty good with money. If I didn't learn to budget early in the marriage, I'm sure I'd be in a big mess right now. But every time pay day comes around, I still get that urge to splurge. In case you don't know, the weather in Texas during the winter months is quite bi polar. It was freezing this morning, which reminded me that I need to get adequate shoes and to buy a jacket. It made me incredibly sad when I wanted to splurge but couldn't, which led me to filling out another application again this morning. I'm ready to make my own money. I sacrificed a little change I had left to buy a gray hoodie for myself and some gloves for my son at ROSS this morning. They were so necessary. Lately, all I can afford is necessary. I can't wait until life becomes semi normal and I can afford things again. After the sadness of having to spend money I didn't want to spend, it turned out my jacked was only 17 bucks and right afterwards I got a call for an interview for the app I filed this morning so whoo hoo! It cheered me up a bit. Hopefully, it just means my future is going to be brighter.

Let's see what else?

Over the past month, I met my new niece. I have been having baby fever sooo badly and this helped cure it.
My heart was ripped out and stomped on, again, at the World Series. My poor Rangers.
My birthday was last month. I turned the big 2-6. Can you believe that crap? Oh well. The cajun food I recieved SEMI made up for me heading to the big 3-0. Exibit A below.

Took my son trick or treating. He had so much fun. He seems to be getting braver and funnier by the day. I need to write the things my son says down so that way I can share it with you guys. He really is a jokester.
I'm currently entertaining an awesome guest at my house for the next few days. It feels wonderful to have such great company.

And that's about it for now. Gearing up for the holidays. Did you know it's been almost a month since I've blogged? Yowsas! I've been getting into the blogging grove the past few days though so hopefully I can get back on track. Blogging is just a part of me and it's one hobby that I've stuck with. So I will try to keep up with this thing for those who care. For now, I'll leave you with this adorable picture of my little tot that I took at the park today.

Anyone else just as pumped that the fall is finally here?

One last thing: my email address for this blog has changed. If you want to get a hold of me, email me at mydearjenn@gmail.com. Can't wait to catch up on everyone's blogs!

Then I started to care what people thought...

2011-10-10T17:01:00.003-05:00

I always thought I would look like this. This is me, 8 months pregnant. One day, when me and my belly had nothing to do, I photoshopped myself how I thought I was going to look. How I kind of felt, that I would look when I was an adult. While I was pregnant, I still felt a bit like myself. Sweet with a side of a bad-ass, I'll do what I want persona. I was awesome. I was very much an individual.

Yesterday, my sister and I somehow stumbled upon how I use to be. In her words, "over the years, your fire died." I'm not sure how exactly it got that way. I threw my whole being into being a mommy and wife. I really do mean it. It was my life. Especially being a military wife. And somehow along the way, I put myself in a cage.

I remember being younger and sometimes getting the disapproval from the older generation in my family or odd looks. I remember not caring. But then I became a wife and mother and content and I got those approval stares. Life was so much easier when I didn't have to hear peoples opinions. I forgot who I was because I became so comfortable with everyone elses opinions. Life gets too comfortable if you just avoid the chaos. I don't want to be comfortable anymore. I just want to be happy again and if chaos comes with my happiness, then so be it.

So without further ado, some news. My husband is seeing someone & so am I (some of you probably already knew this). The fact that we are both seeing someone so soon after our announcement has to make you wonder how detached from our relationship we must have been to try to move on so quickly. Has it been hard? Of course it has. It's not like its comfortable to see the man, who was and still legally is my husband, promising forever to another person. I was still his wife and the one he loved but a few months ago. However, under the circumstances and after many discussionswith him, we are clearly on different mentality levels. I always told him that I didn't feel comfortable going to school or working because I didn't want to pass him up, growth wise. And I really meant that. I feel like I dumbed myself down a bit. Not that he's dumb but like I explained to someone recently, "I shouldn't feel horrible that he doesn't understand me if I'm speaking French while he's speaking English." <---metaphor, not literally. And he is a surface scratcher while I dive underneath the surface. Just two different people. Apples and Oranges. While it still bothers me that it did not work out, I really do understand it now. And I have to deal with any emotion that I meet with an understanding that this is the best for us both. I cannot grow with him & I need someone that wants to grow with me. That's just how it is.

Anyway, I still care what some people think. I've been trained for years to be that way now. Slowly but surely, however, I can feel the shell that surrounds me crackling. Pretty soon it will peel off and my old self will come back to life. Question is, am I ready for it? Do I even remember her? Time will tell.

Football season

2011-10-03T00:43:00.001-05:00

Since I've just popped out of my slump here within the past month or so, I just realized football season has started. I know, I'm running wayyy behind. I guess it also doesn't help that we don't have cable at my place (hello Netflix!). I'm from Texas so you are right to assume that I'm either a Texan or a Cowboys fan. I'm also from Dallas, so I'm sure you can correctly guess which team I root for. Even if they are disapointing lately and got their butts handed to them by the Lions. So, I want to know, do you watch football? If so, who do you root for?

And just in case you were wondering, I totally have shorts on in this picture ;)

You HAVE to keep smiling.

2011-09-30T18:17:00.000-05:00

I'm back from my vacation. Actually, I've been back for over a week now. I had to patiently wait a few more days after my return to have my son in my arms again. I was kind of worried about that to be honest. For some reason, my sons demeanor changed when he was with his father and he always seemed to be grouchy and never want to talk to me. When I arrived at the airport, I waited outside of a door for them to walk out. My son didn't see me at first but when he did his whole face lit up and he threw up his arms and yelled "MOMMY!" It was exactly what I had been wanting. He kissed his Dad goodbye and we walked off to the car.

Then I stopped. I sat on a chair, grabbed my son and started tearing up. This was the first R&R that I had not been with my husband. I just realized what happened and it just hit me hard. I could still see my husband walking away and it really hurt. You guys, I cannot express how much it hurt me. Most people around me think that because I decided to end this, that I'm not in any pain. I am very much in pain. I try my best to smile every day but it is painful. My heart hurts every day. Just a little less as time goes on but I am still bothered by it. I have to remind myself that I can hurt and heal at the same time.

One obstacle I've come across during this whole process is keeping it classy. There have been plenty of times where I've wanted to lash out. Wanted to punch someone. Wanted to scream and say the most evil things on the planet. But I don't. I can say whatever or do whatever I want & I choose to keep it together. I'd like to believe that it's because I hope when my son gets older, he can see how to appropriately react when angry. However, the real reason I keep it classy, is because I know it's exactly who I am. It's how I react to things. Sure, sometimes I rebel but for the most part I keep myself composed. It's difficult. It is definitely not easy. But if you find yourself in this situation, just know that keeping it together as much as possible really is the best decision. A hard decision but the best. Nothing good comes out of being an asshole but more backlash that you have to deal with. And I'm definitely not in the mood to deal with anything extra.

Somehow, I'm still alive. No matter what this process throws in my face, I am still here. You think divorce is suppose to kill you but it doesn't. You think that when you go through this process, your soul is suppose to be ripped out & gutted, but that doesn't happen. I'm still here, waking up every single day, somehow putting a smile on my face.

I also wanted to take this quick moment to thank you all. You have NO IDEA how much your support via twitter, this blog, emails and other ways we speak have encouraged me to keep going. To be more positive. To be okay with all of this. No idea people. I can't believe how much support you guys have given me. There are times where I just want to sit and cry & vent it out on twitter and you're encouraging words help me through the day. Thank you so much. I have so much to look forward to in my life & you guys have been nothing but good to me. I knew I started blogging just to document my life but I never realized how much support would actually be out there and how it would help me through the difficult times. So thank you again :)

I'll be back soon.

2011-09-14T15:16:00.001-05:00

My husband is home on R&R with our son. It's all much harder than I thought it would be. So I'm near the Puget Sound, trying to take a breather and self reflect. And for the first time in my life, I watched the sun go down. It was beautiful. For a moment there, the whole world stood still and the only thing that mattered was the way the sun was setting behind the mountains. And for a second, I was at peace. I hope I have more moments like that in the future.

So now you know.

2011-09-07T11:57:00.001-05:00

Some of you know that I'm going through a divorce. I had posted a nice, long post about it the other day but decided to remove it because I wasn't sure if I was 100% telling the truth. The husband and I had an argument and I wasn't sure which direction it was gonna go. We had been taking the civil route but the last few discussion we've had, have had me worried. I wish I could go into detail about this but I'm practicing what I preach and keeping it personal, even if the other side of this equation isn't. I am a product of divorce (a nasty one that's been lasting a bit one sided for years) and I know exactly how I don't want this to be handled, because of my son. I know what the outcome would be if I stooped down a few levels and I'd rather put my focus into my little boy. I just want what is right and I am going to try to remain as civil as possible because I love my child more than I do reacting on my bitterness.

I asked for an epiphany. Last night I received it. This post from Elliequent also played a role in my mind altering shift that I had last night as well. I could never be happier with any decision I've ever made, than I am with this divorce. Honestly. I am happy. Every thing I ever did or said during this whole process, got me to my current state of happiness and understanding. For that, I have no regrets. Not one damn thing do I regret. Even the things that were my fault in this equation. No regrets. I am just thankful to be alive and with my baby boy. It's all I could ever ask for. I have so much happiness, promise & personal growth waiting for me that it is hard to be mad at the situation I'm going through.

And for those of you who commented on that post I deleted, I'm so grateful for all of your kind words. You guys have truly been amazing. Especially knowing that there are a few of you out there going through the same thing. Blogging has been so therapeutic and I'm so grateful for this wonderful community.

What my blog really isn't telling you.

2011-08-28T19:18:00.002-05:00

I like to wear my shirts without bras. Society tells me that I can't do this out in public or it will be trashy. Society is a bossy bitch. She (I've identified her as a female for apparent reasons) has a lot of rules. She makes you feel bad about your decisions. Doesn't matter if it feels right, you're still wrong. Who the hell is she? Who made up all these rules? We did. Let's go over some of these rules, shall we?

Breast feeding in public is disgusting. Boobs are just for sex, not for babies to get nourishment.
Tattoos and piercings apparently affect the way you perform on the job.
Doesn't matter if you love someone of the same sex, you can't marry them. Because your feelings ARE less important than tradition.
If you aren't a Christian, you're a sinner. If you're an Atheist, you believe in the devil.
Being a stay at home mother is such a blessing but in the real world, is irrelevant. You're just lazy.
If you're black, you commit crimes. If you're brown, you're illegal (or a terrorist) & if you're white, you're perfect.

The list goes on. How did we end up this way? Whoever said that we could tell each other what to do? By the looks of it, our superiority is destructive. Especially to the earth. We only care about ourselves in that regard as well. We are better than the place that gives us the ground to stand on. It's okay that we dump trash on her because once it's outta sight, its outta mind. Where did our sympathy go? Where did our freedom to make our own choices, without backlash, go?

I spent a good part of my life being myself. Over the last few years, I gave up. Not because I didn't want to be myself. Being yourself is such a battle in this world sometimes. Settling with life was incredibly easy and gave me less stress. And lets just say, from a girl who battles with depression and self expression, stress is the last thing I want on my mind. So I took the easy road. The easy road, however, started to kill me. Little by little, I felt the last part of my quirkiness start to die. I felt like a zombie, going through the motions of life. I felt like I was standing in the middle of a train station, staring at the wall, while the world passed me by. I felt nothing. I didn't even feel alive.

Depression kills. Depression is also labeled as a weakness. If you're depressed, it's because you did it to yourself on purpose, said Society. Society threw me in the bottom of the barrel. I had thoughts I shouldn't be having & dreams I didn't want to dream. Luckily, however, I don't really believe in heaven so I know if I were gone, there would be nothing waiting for me on the other end.

Then one day I woke up, rolled over and saw the face of a beautiful little boy fast asleep. What was I doing? The one thing that kept me going was right here, snuggled up in my chest. After much googling, I found this link. Everything the counselor wrote, struck a cord. But these three paragraphs, exclusively, just changed my life:

You are not your behavior, the lack of love that you feel, and the hurt that you've experienced. So who are you? What do you like, what don’t you like? What parts of yourself are you comfortable with, which parts do you despise about yourself? Where are you angry with yourself? Where do you not let love into your own soul?

You’re tired of being who you think other people want you to be. In a way, you’re in an emotional rebellion. If you can’t be who you really are and feel loved and accepted for you, warts and all, it can make you feel like life is hardly worth living.

Your body, mind and soul are trying to communicate to you that something needs to change, that you can’t go on the way you have, that it’s just not working for you. All the hurt you’ve experienced is cumulative, and you’ve gone numb to stop the pain, which would overwhelm you if you were feeling the emotions right now.

I got the epiphany that I was looking for to snap the hell out of it. All thanks to Google and an online counselor. Please don't get me wrong, I have not done a 180. As a matter of fact, I have barely moved but every time I take baby steps, I feel a little more released from this illness. I feel the weight on my chest slowly getting lighter. I feel whatever part of the old me I had left, start to grow again. I'm on the verge of something incredibly life changing. I need to change my life. I have no other option. The dark side was obviously no fun at all, so there is only one direction to go. Into the light. Back to happiness. Back to actually "feeling" alive.

I gained so much weight (10lbs on my frame is a bit much) and I woke up this morning to find myself at my goal weight once again. My life is getting better. I'm currently going through some things besides depression and it's been a struggle but I'm getting through it. Somehow I wake up every day, hopeful for the little bit of happiness I gain tomorrow. I woke up with a smile on my face today, which rarely ever happens. I plan to have a lot of firsts in my life. I plan to really change it. I plan to do things that I want to do, no matter the backlash.

So, dear readers, expect change. I'm not kidding. You guys have been so supportive through every thing and I am forever grateful. Forever grateful for you strangers and your acceptance of someone you don't know. Sure, some might think, this chic has problems and they'll bounce like Tigger but those that end up staying, thank you.

And really, if you know anyone with depression or who struggles to be themselves, know that they need you to be there. To be supportive. Whether you agree with their decisions, dreams or aspirations or not, the only thing you can do is be supportive. Nobody should have to go as far into the dark as I have. Nobody should. We all deserve to be happy. Even if people don't agree to why we are happy.

And if there is anyone out there who is struggling with depression, know that there is help for you. Nobody can help you if you don't want to help yourself. You have to ask for help. Please remember, it's okay not to be okay.

Now, as for society bossing me around again, guess what? I'm not wearing a bra. I'm also wearing a white shirt and exposing myself to the public. What are you gonna do about it? Nothing. Because I said so.

Make it go away!

2011-08-19T21:19:00.000-05:00

This blue maxi dress, once again, has creeped up on to my blog. Not only was it in my last post but it is now in my new header. However, I PROMISE this will be the last time in a LONG time that I post a picture with this dress on my blog because let's just say, it just shrunk. Doesn't even fit properly. However, I took it for a spin on Wednesday. I planned to take all kinds of pictures and participate in No Model Lady's All Dressed Up Post but alas, this did not happen. By the way, I won this necklace and ring from NML's giveaway recently and got it super fast. It is VERY cute! I love it. Anywhoo, I did not make it home in time to post the pictures for All Dressed Up. So, I just decided to post my second ever fashion post. Here is my first, just in case you forgot. Although, you won't be getting anything fancy. I packed up cowboy boots, cardigans, scarves, my purse and a few hats that I was planning to take pictures with. This did not go as planned. It was 102 degrees outside and just wayy too hot. It was overall semi-unpleasant and just add on to the fact that the dress fit in all the wrong places. It didn't even feel like the dress I fell in love with on that clearance rack, all because it shrunk. I better shut up. I griped just like this in the last post. Nobody cares but me so lets move on!!!

My dear friend Dessirae took these with my camera by the way. They came out pretty decent so now she thinks she's super awesome :) All the pictures were taken here at the local park behind my house. It's not even a park really, its more for those who like to ride bike trails. I wanted to take pictures at the pond but that thing dried the heck up. So sad. On with the show...

I don't know what was going on that day but I was totally sporting the curves of a Kardashian.
I guess that's not a super bad thing huh?

Dress: Target, clearance | Belt: Value Village, thrifted | Shoes: Forever 21, on sale for 9 bucks

Meanwhile, in the background, my son pretended to be Diego and search for animals.
All he found was a bug of course.

And just for kicks, the only decent picture we could get of him and I together. We were both semi miserable at this point. It's time for the Texas heat to die down bc I'm trying to enjoy the sun, not fry in it.

At the end of this ten minute shoot, we hurried up, hopped in the car and drove off in relief. Although, I did make Dessirae drive around and could not believe all the open fields that were off the side of the road. I made her stop once to take a few pictures, which can be found in the header. Boy oh boy will I be happy when the heat dies down. Those open fields were GORGEOUS!

All photos were taken with my Canon Rebel Xsi, a 50mm lens with the "no flash" setting, by a non professional :)

Let me show you something

2011-08-15T14:39:00.004-05:00

I was going to write my San Francisco road trip post (Part One/Two/Three ) but ultimately decided that I wasn't in the mind frame for that. And by mind frame, my whole desk area has to be cleared, all the chores have to be done and my mind at peace for the day. Peace?! Yea, right. Not today! So guess what you get? An Instagram dump. I figured you guys haven't had a cell phone dump in awhile so here we go!

The past few weeks I have:

Gone to the local Farmers Market, twice.

Eaten way too much Mooayh

Been entertained by Emery who seems to interrupt every picture I take

Had great times with friends and family

[And after months, I found and purchased my first maxi dress. LOVE!]

Been entertained by autocorrect fails of mine

and brain fails by my friends

I also bought & wore my first ever wedges, which were on clearance from Target. I got 5 compliments at the Farmers market for this simple outfit. Dress was from JC Penny on clearance as well. Everything else, thrifted.

And just in case you didn't know, I have been recovering from a very bad highlight job. Way too many highlights and way too bright. Made me look OLD. I don't know why I thought the blonde highlights he showed me were going to come out caramel, like I wanted. Hairdressers are not always right.

I also lost 9lbs since we left Alaska at the end of May.

This was me at my goal weight two weeks ago.

My sister and I had went vegetarian for almost a week and a half and worked out slightly and saw actual progress! We lost 3 lbs. And let me tell you, all I did was walk for an hour a day. I have very much been slacking and gained two lbs back, so I'll be going back to healthier eating habits and exercising once a day again.

One last thing. I really wanted to share this recent video from fellow blogger Reyna, who I have posted about in the past. I love her blogs and you should totally go check them out:

Also, I won some rad necklaces from a recent giveaway and cannot wait to get them. I hope you guys have been well!!!

Btw, if my blog looks off, that's because it is. It's undergoing some adjustments and I've been a bit lazy to fix the problems. Pretty sure it will go through a makeover soon so just bare with me! It's just having a bit of plastic surgery :)

Baby Love.

2011-07-26T17:37:00.003-05:00

Ever since we got back to Texas, my son (Superbaby) and nephew (Superboy) have a new friend, Superchica. Our friend Dessirae has a daughter who is the same age. Since Dessirae is over all the time and practically lives with us, they love her just like she is their sister. As a matter of fact, my son actually told me that Superchica is his sister. So is it gross that I make them take super cute toddler love pictures together? Totally fine, right?

Or that we make them pretend that they are going on a date, together, to a baseball game?

It's super cute, right? And like most couples, they tend to get on each others nerves.

Never say never

2011-07-25T16:30:00.000-05:00

When I was a teenager, I never wanted children. I clearly remember me saying out loud, "Once you have kids, your life is over." What I really meant in my teenage mind was that I literally couldn't fathom caring for another human being and balancing out my goals. That once you have a child, anything you ever dreamed of was tossed into the gutter. That a child was a ball and chain. That children were depressing. I did not really like kids when I was younger.

When I got married, I still didn't care for kids. I still didn't imagine myself having any. I told my husband that they might be possible in the future but I really didn't mean it. I imagined myself in the city with a bustling job, a glamorous social life and following whatever dreams I had at the moment. Military life clearly put a damper on that because there are very little bases located near the city. And one day, after my husbands first deployment, I uttered words that I never imagined coming out of my mouth.

"Let's have a baby."

I'm not sure how it happened or why but my mind changed. I was afraid, however, that because I was such a quiet little child that I would have a demon baby. No matter how calm and natural my pregnancy was, I was worried. And no, I don't mean a literal demon popping out of my oven but a crybaby. Even though I was FULLY prepared to handle a colicky baby (mentally), who wants that? I always shooed the worst out of my mind though because I started to fall in love with this unborn baby. I had never wanted something so much in my life at this point. My mind refocused when I felt those first powerful flutter kicks at 13 weeks. And when I say powerful, I do mean it. I was very tiny and thin when I was pregnant (106lbs) and my husband and I were laying down in the bed. All of a sudden, I felt a vibration in my belly and flicked on the lights. There my belly was, moving. Literally being kicked. It was amazing. I relished the moment until I imagined the worst, hulk baby. Why can I see this baby kicking at 13 weeks? The normal is between 16-22 weeks. My belly got pretty plump fast (nothing but belly) because I was skinny but it freaked me out.

By the end of my pregnancy, I literally looked like I might explode.

A few days before I had our son, I was getting stares from people in the mall and little girls yelling "She is so big! She's got to be having twins." It was horrible. I only REALLY blew up at 37 weeks because the weeks prior, I had a big but perfectly shaped baby belly. I just felt like I was being punished when I stepped on that scale a week from my last appointment and discovered I gained 4lbs! In a week! I was still calm and happy but in the back of my mind, like always, I expected the worse.

Then I went into labor. My epidural didn't work so I spent 24 hours passing in and out of consciousness. It took me an hour and a half to push him out. I didn't know what the problem was because the doctor said she suspected him to be 7lbs. After an hour and a half, the geniuses at the hospital finally guessed "Maybe he is much bigger than we thought." Snip, snip and bam. A blue little creature found himself in the arms of the nurse. I waited for him to cry. He only yelped. Then he saw us. "9lbs 4oz" The doctor said. I apparently had the biggest baby in the hospital that day (or maybe even week) because the nurses were in awe. He looked like a normal baby to me.

The moment he laid eyes on us, it seemed magical. He never cried from that day on. He has been my most prized possession. I wasn't being punished at all. Everything that my little body went through brought me to this angel. He wasn't a burden. He didn't ruin my life. As a matter of fact, he 100% completely made it better. He was the easiest, quietest most reserve baby I ever laid eyes on. He was completely wonderful. He currently still IS completely wonderful. He is quiet like me yet enthusiastic like his father. We balance each other out. He has the BEST personality and he is still just as beautiful as the day I gave birth to him.

I guess I just wrote this post because I just realized his 4th birthday is coming up. It really does seem just like yesterday and it tugs at my heart that he is so big. Everybody says that but everybody means it as well. He has been my little sidekick from the day he was born. Do you ever just want to cry when looking at your child, no matter how old they are? I do, all the time. Now the question is, will I have more children? Could I even love another child as much as I love my son? I would say never but look how that ended up. I'm not sure about that future but my son does know one thing. If I ever have a little girl, her name will be Iron Man.

Road Trip: Northern California, Part Three

2011-07-21T15:05:00.000-05:00

Part One / Part Two

It was very late in the evening when we left Eugene but we were determined to get to California by the end of the day. We pumped gas twice in Oregon & if you didn't know, they have attendants to do that. We asked the last attendant why they have people to pump our gas when we can do it for ourselves and he told us that it created more jobs. With that note, never again will I rag on having someone else pump my gas.

At one point, I decided to drive (in the dark for the first time) but it started to rain and it was exactly where the roads go windy. I'm not even kidding. The roads from Oregon INTO California were horribly windy and incredibly scary. At least to me and my sister who aren't use to such a thing. We were ready to get out of those hills on a positive note but before you knew it, we got pulled over. No ticket but the guy thought we were swerving and falling asleep. I tend to believe that he was falling asleep and making that up because we were definitely wide awake. THEN my son got sick in the car. I wanted to believe it was because of car sickness but turned out to be the bug my nephew had prior. At this point it was so late in the night that we were just desparate for a hotel. We were already tired of the traveling, the rain, the cold, the dreary weather (we hadn't really seen a ton of sunlight since our arrival into the lower 48), the over crowded car, the bad luck and the sickness that I think we were on the verge of crying.

And then we opened our eyes.

Yreka, California welcomed us with big fat sunny arms.

And just like that, the day felt a little better. It will still a bit too cool for my taste (maybe 65?) but there was no sign of rain (at that moment). The scenery was a bit western and I really enjoyed it.

This mountain literally seemed to pop up out of nowhere but it really was such a refreshing site to see.

My son was still sick.

However, no matter how miserable he looks in this picture he acted normal the whole time. It was a 24 hour bug & it really died down by this time the picture was taken. The bag was there just for precaution. My nephew, on the other hand, was very much over his sickness & enjoyed looking at the animals on the side of the road.

We passed through Weed, California and had a giggle. Then my sister had to make a pit stop to pee. Where she discovered one of the many horrific things we would find on the side of the road. BRACE YOURSELVES READERS!!!

I know. I am even disgusted that we took a picture of it like we found treasure. Sick.

A few hours later, we started talking about what we would do in Sacramento. After browsing on our phones, using up our internet data (which btw, AT&T phone coverage was the suckiest ever on the way to Texas) my sister made a surprising conclusion. She was about to make my dreams come true. It was just one little sentence. We weren't going to Sacramento anymore. This little car full of 4 people, 6+ bags and a dog were making a detour to fulfill my dream. We were going to San Francisco...

Road Trip: Washington & Oregon, Part Two

2011-07-19T23:41:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the delay you guys. It's been 3 weeks since my last entry. Since I have been a bit more inspired every day, I decided to pick up where I left off: my road trip. I'm sure there are some of you out there who want to hear this story all the way through, right? If you haven't already, start here. If you already read the last entry, I'll start where I left off :)

The next day, we waited for our friend Michael to come pick us up. This is Michael and I the last time I saw him in 2009 (Six Flags in 50 degree weather for the win!). We met in AIT (2004) and he's been a VIP in my life ever since.

He also happens to live in the Seattle area which was incredibly convenient for us, since we had to pick up my sisters car a few days after we got in. Let me tell you what an incredible PLUS it was to spend time with one of my best friends. I realized it much later but if we hadn't met up with people we loved, the trip would have been beyond miserable.

Anyway, we sat at the hotel waiting for his arrival. His car wasn't big enough for four people plus a dog. I say one dog because my sister took Jasmine to the airport that morning to fly to Dallas. Well Michael called me a few minutes before he got to the hotel & it turned out not ONLY did we have to crunch time but it was an Eclipse he was bringing that ALREADY had two carseats in it (we brought our own). Yes, I was freaking. When he pulled up in his brothers Eclipse, I felt my heart pound and freak out as I tried to figure out how this would work. However, it all seemed to calm down when I saw how happy he was to see us. It had been a long time since I had seen someone so close to me, that it really felt surreal. And even when he popped the trunk to find out that it was stuffed with crap and no room for our stuff, I was okay. We kept Emery at the hotel for a bit and went down to Denny's to chat. During the chat, I decided "EFF IT. Let's get a rental car." And why would I get a rental car if we were picking up our car that day?

BECAUSE THE CAR SHIPPING COMPANY WAS IGNORING MY SISTER. Not answering their phones and being rude as hell when they did. They promised that day we could pick the car up but were beating around the bush. Did they know that there were 4 people+ one dog ready to get the hell outta Seattle and start their trip? No and even if they did, they didn't care.

Plus we were on a crunch time bc Michael had to pick his brother up from school in the town they lived in, which was an hour away. Picking up a rental car was the best decision we made.

We ended up staying at Michael's family's little cottage house for a day. A house that WASN'T equipped with a shower/toilet bc it was in the process of being remodeled/finished. So let's just say there was a lot of squatting outside. That day we went to the mall for the first time

drove by Fort Lewis & ate at a bomb ass mexican restaurant where the portions were absurd but the prices were incredibly cheap. We spent a nice night around a makeshift fire bs-ing and enjoying each others company. It was good times, I tell ya! Until later on when my nephew spent the night throwing up everywhere. Poor guy.

That morning when my sister went to get her vehicle, she found out the company had scheduled to tow it. Um, yeah. Luckily, that didn't happen but it just added to the stress. So we decided to spend the night at a local hotel so the boys could go swimming. We headed to WalMart, grabbed some floaties and relaxed in the water. The boys would not pay attention to my sister or I as long as Michael was around. We felt neglected LOL. I guess they were just super happy another guy was around. The next day, we packed up our belongings and headed out on our journey. Needless to say, my little guy cried his eyes out when he discovered we were leaving his new friend. He loves too hard just like his mama. It was a little heartbreaking bc I was reminded we were going to do that a few times throughout the year.

After we said our goodbyes, we headed down the coast. Our first real stop was in Vancouver, Washington where we took our first real steps into a Target. It was wonderful but this was the most exciting part:

Crossing into our FIRST STATE! It was kind of magical to be honest even though it was a bit dreary outside. Portland turned out to be very different looking than the cities I'm use to but in a good way. I kind of like the industrial look.

I wish I could have explored more but we were trying to get to Eugene, Oregon (Home of the Ducks) to meet with another friend who is very special to us. We got there JUST IN TIME to eat dinner with our dearest friend Brittany and her family. Brittany was our first ever Army wife friend and we were all pregnant together in Fort Hood. It was so beyond nice to see her again as well as her husband and daughter. Our kids are obviously all around the same age, so they took to each other VERY quickly.

(excuse my roughness. believe me, it was a very rough beginning of the trip)

At the end of our dinner, we said goodbye. The kids were very upset that they had to part ways but it gives us an excuse to go back to visit. It was time to get to California before it got dark...

Road Trip: Washington, Part One

2011-06-27T14:36:00.000-05:00

Around this time last month, I was packing and moving. I hadn't quite left Alaska yet but we were in our final days. Forgive me if these posts about the trip aren't as passionate and detailed as they should be. The whole trip itself was incredibly exhausting. We weren't taking a plain road trip. We were moving our lives literally across country, in a tiny car.

The morning we left Alaska, my sister and I hadn't slept. We were literally moving and cleaning up, to the minute we hopped in the truck and headed to the airport. Being attacked by mosquitoes while we were at it. I'm sure I looked ridiculous in my sundress & hat running back and forth at four in the morning to the dumpster. It was very weird driving away knowing I wasn't ever coming back to that house. My son cried before he went to bed. He just realized that his toys were gone and everything in the house was missing. His exact words were "I want my toys back. I want my bed back. I want my life back.". What a statement coming from a 3 year old, right? He still mentions the red house we lived in but is happy about this new place. Especially since this place is around the corner from people he loves...and a pool.

Anywhoo, we gathered our bags (all 6+ of them), our dogs and their kennels & finally boarded the plane to Seattle. Our boys only got a few hours of sleep, so it was no surprise that my son passed out on the plane. It is a 3.5 hour plane ride after all.

Travel Tip: ALWAYS bring a blanket if you are taking a plane ride.

Alaska Airlines does not carry blankets or pillows and I can't remember the last time I rode a plane that even offered them anymore. It was freezing on the flight and I was wearing a dress. I covered up my son with the ONLY thing I had, which was my pink bandana. I was not comfortable one bit on the flight. Not one bit. I was miserable and tired. I tried to put a smile on my face though because I was excited about the trip.

We finally arrived in Seattle. Lugged our crapload of bags around and went to find our pets. Found a guy with a skycap (some extra large cart thingie) who helped us find where we needed to stand to take the shuttle to the hotel. Our last conversation went like this:

Me: "Thank you sooo much for helping us."

Him: "Now you help me for helping you and give me a tip."

Yea, that caught me off guard. We gave him his tip and waited by the curb for the shuttle. Then I noticed something peculiar. For one, I was freezing. When we left Alaska, it was about 75 degrees or at least it felt like it. Incredibly warm, I tell ya. When I got off that plane and stepped outside, the air stopped me in my tracks. What tha....it is COLD! My first thought was how happy I was that I brought my blue cardigan. My second thought was, wow am I out of place. Not only was it cloudy and 50 something degrees but everyone was wearing dark colors and carrying backpacks. I, on the other hand, was wearing the brightest yellow little sundress with sandals. And to top it all off, I was wearing my big brown bonnet looking hat. Honestly, I didn't truly care about that. There is nothing embarrassing about looking like a southern belle. I looked pretty, dang it. There is something to be said about looking so cute and shivering like crazy though.

We eventually got to our hotel. Lugged everything to the top floor, dogs and all.

Great view, right? (note the sarcasm)

Oh waittt, I completely forgot to leave out one key part of this story. The lovely people at Toyota Financial did not allow me to ship my vehicle. Apparently if you are financing through them, they don't allow you to ship your vehicle for whatever reason. Not even if you have insurance or if you are paying for it, nada. Oh, I take that back. They let you ship, if you have PCS orders but that is IT. No shipping for personal use at all. So that completely screwed me. Oh and did I mention, that I didn't get my license? Without getting off topic, lets just say the lady said I was a great driver but made a few mistakes (don't watch CA videos on youtube if you are getting an AK license bc apparently the laws aren't the same) and if I would have parallel parked closer to the curb, I would have passed. Which BY THE WAY, I have NEVER parallel parked in my life, watched a youtube video before the test and I thought I did a great job. I parked straight and perfect but apparently not close enough. Because I don't want to sulk in the misery I had that day, let's move back on to my travels shall we? It is embarrassing enough to be in my mid twenties without a license.

I still didn't feel relaxed at the hotel. We still had so much on our minds. Tomorrow, we were planning to get our vehicle. We were hungry and tired. We decided to take a nap, which turned in to a 6 HOUR nap. After we woke up, we went to the Denny's that was in walking distance. I was still transitioning from Alaska mode while eating. It took me for a loop that I actually noticed the sun setting.

We also knew we weren't in AK anymore when we walked to the gas station & a man came in asking to fill up a HUGE Hawaiian punch jug with water for his car.

That next morning was almost disastrous. Since Toyota didn't allow me to ship my vehicle, we didn't have room for my sisters dog. So her dog, Jasmine had to be shipped. 4 oclock rolls around and USAA didn't pay us on time. This was the only time ever that we needed to be paid ON TIME & it blew up in our face. My sister was suppose to put Jasmine on the flight around then. Our money didn't show up & we couldn't put Jasmine on the flight. We had to wait a few hours later and ship her then. While waiting, my sister took the dogs out to go to the restroom. My nephew was up that early so he went along. As they were letting the dogs do their business, a strange man came up to my sister asking for money. When she said she didn't have any, he gave her a blank confusing stare. She didn't know if something weird was about to happen or what. LUCKILY, Jasmine came to the rescue and creeped up from around the corner barking and growling. The man backed off and my sister & nephew came back inside. Jasmine kind of got on my nerves until I learned of that. Who knows what could have happened if she weren't there!

Travel Tip: If you are a woman, do not go out to smoke or take your dogs out so early in the morning (especially in a big city) when no one is around. It is not safe!

I didn't realize I was writing a novel, so I'll stop here for now. Even just THINKING about the trip is mentally exhausting and I can now understand why I've avoided writing about it. All I know is that it gets better....I THINK! :)

*please forgive me for the post being all over the place and all my grammatical mistakes. As you can tell, this has already been one hell of a trip <3

Queen of Procrastination

2011-06-16T04:00:00.000-05:00

You guys, I'm lame. I should have totally knocked out some blog entries by now. Well at least I THOUGHT I was ready to knock them all out. Obviously, I'm not. In all honesty, there have been so many changes in my life that I'm not even ready to write about the long exhausting trip that I just finished. I had over 500 pictures on my camera and over 500 on my cell phone...it might take awhile. However, I'm stopping in to say hello to everyone and want you to know that I have not forgotten about you guys.

My sister and I actually spent yesterday looking for a place to live. This is us in the bathroom while stopping at Brookshires in search of a Thrifty Nickel:

We are currently cooped up in my grandparents house and when I say cooped up, I mean it. As much as I am use to living in a tiny space with a big family, I love having my own space. Which is why I'm totally crossing my fingers for this process to go as fast and as smoothly as possible. We should hopefully know something by the end of the day *crosses fingers*. I'm actually lounging on the futon in the back room writing this, as my son fiddles around on my cell phone. Emery and my other sisters little dog are jumping around all over me and its the closest thing to silence and personal space I've had in awhile :)

Even though I have yet to post pictures and things about the trip, I'm going to fast forward to the present day and let you know what else I've been doing. After we got here, my mom took my sisters and I to Joe Pool Lake and it was the first time I've swam in an open body of water without freezing my knickers off. The lake water was warm and my son is just having the best time of his life. Speaking of my son, look at him being super silly in Old Navy:

That was all his idea. He's a comedic baby genius. You should have seen it in person. I guess he gets it from his grandpa (my dad), because look at what I took a picture of him doing yesterday:

In times like these, I need this kind of silliness in my life.

Oh and one more thing. If you ever need to lose weight, put yourself under stressful situations. Apparently, the two weeks of stressing about moving and making a cross country trip caused me to lose 5 lbs. At the end of my trip, all of the shorts that I brought that I knew didn't fit, fit perfectly. If not perfectly, loosely. I couldn't believe it. I mean, I knew the Texas sun would melt the fat off but the move did more than that. I am at my goal weight as well. Thank you Texas and deployments? Oh and thank you to the lower 48 for my instant tan. It only took 4 hours to get three shades darker:

Let me just say, as well, that it is so nice to be with friends and family again. I've never felt more like myself, than being around the people I love.

So sorry this post is all over the place. It's just reflecting my current state of mind. I promise to be a little more on track next time. I just really can't wait to be settled and finally be able to breathe. *inhales* Just ready to have a routine and get back to regular blogging again.

Until next time, you can catch me rambling on twitter.

Just a quickie

2011-06-07T11:55:00.002-05:00

I have 17 (driving) hours until we reach our final destination. I am currently in Arizona at my brother in laws family's house. We decided to take a break from all the traveling and soak up some sun at Wet N Wild here. The trip started out incredibly bumpy (almost disastrous) and was raining most of the time. If it weren't for meeting up with a few friends along the way, I might have pulled my hair out. It got MUCH better after our detour to San Francisco. Of course, I'll talk about all of this later but I wanted to stop in and say a quick hello. Now, I've gotta get back on the road and finish up the trip home! See you guys soon!

And if you haven't already, go check out all the guest posts! These lovely ladies did me such a favor and wrote some awesome posts, so give them a peak when you get a chance :)

Guest Post: A Pretty Little Place in North Carolina

2011-06-03T04:00:00.005-05:00

Shackleford Banks by Emily Roe

I suppose the predictable travel theme for me to write would be about my experience living in Alaska, but you can read any of my blog posts to get the lowdown on my journey. Today I’m choosing to write about my favorite place in the entire world, Shackleford Banks, North Carolina. The Cape (Cape Lookout) is the most beautiful place on earth --it’s where the sea meets the sky and wild Spanish horses roam free.

This sliver of island is magical. To your front, the waves form swallow swells that in the sun, sparkle in clustered shades of blues and greens. As the waves roll in and out with the tide, it brings forth tiny confetti shells that wedge themselves in the grainy buttery sand -perfect for little hands to scoop into brightly colors sand pales. Boats of all sizes are scarred along the shoreline that screams “summer is here.” To your back, lime green sea oats rattle and sway with the ocean breeze and wild ponies lazily graze the island. Above you, soars seagulls that constantly dips and skims the glass-like water for small fish. And of course, to your left and right, there are miles and miles of pristine beaches. If you could scoop up a spoonful of this magic, I imagine is tastes like a combination of honey and mint. It’s hands down soul satisfying.

My most favorite memories of The Cape would be without a doubt Fourth of July weekends. We all sat around in tacky colored beach chairs, laughing and reminiscing of past trips to The Cape, while Jimmy Buffet blares over the radio in the background. The guys would take off from time to time to cast a few fishing lines from the boat, while the kids splashed in the water and built sandcastles completed with seashell towers. And when the sting from the sun got too hot, us ladies would take a dip into the salty water. It was a weekend where the American flag adorned every boat, and we all grilled, enjoyed each others company, and we swam and relaxed until the sun started setting.

I hold this place dear to my heart. It’s where your hectic life takes the back burner, your to-do list is non-existent, and extra helpings of pure happiness and togetherness are dished out.

~Emily

Guest Post: Travel Stories - Amsterdam, Paris & MORE!

2011-06-01T04:00:00.003-05:00

Hi everyone! My name is Ingrid from Viva La Happy and the lovely Jenn is letting me share some of my travel stories with you as she makes her way back to Texas. I wanted to share a fantastic trip I took to Europe in the summer of 2008. I also want to give you some tips in case you are planning a trip of your own.

I was attending college when I took this trip and it was actually a short study abroad program that was open to anyone interested in going. I knew that I always wanted to travel to Europe and I figure that this was the way to do it. A plus was that I was able to bring along anyone I wanted, even if they didn't attend my school. I brought along my best friend Gina and my cousin Jessica. The trip overall was 10 days long and we went to 4 countries. We first arrived in Amsterdam.

We were so excited when we first got there! Now my first tip to anyone traveling to the western part of Europe in July.. it is not hot. We made the mistake of packing a lot of summer clothing (shorts, skirts, tank tops). We had to actually buy some hoodies and jeans to wear because it was chilly.

Amsterdam was fantastic and such a cute city. If you decide that Amsterdam is a city that you'd like to visit definitely check out these places.

1. Anne Frank house.

2. The Rijks Museum

3. Royal Palace

4. Windmill Van Sloten

5. Take the Canal Cruise

(Outside Rijks Museum)

The next part of our journey was to Belgium. Believe it or not we only spent a day and a half in Belgium and we were able to visit three cities. We drove to Brugge, Ghent, and spent the night in Brussels. Another tip for anyone traveling in Europe is to use public transportation. It is unbelievably easy to travel from one place to another by bus, subway, or train and it is very affordable. These three cities were so beautiful and made me feel like I was in a fairytale with the canals and stone buildings.

While in Belgium be sure to try their chocolate and waffles of course! We did a lot of sight seeing here and since we weren't there for very long I don't really have a list of must sees for you.

Our next stop... Paris!

Oh ladies this is the city of love! I was not let down when we arrived here. We spent three days in Paris so we were definitely able to do a lot. Places I highly recommend on going to are:

1. Eiffel Tower (duh!)

2. The Louvre

3. Check out the Moulin Rouge (Ewan McGregor sadly was not there I checked)

4. Please take a train to The Palace of Versailles. AMAZING!

When you visit the Eiffel Tower do it both during the day and at night. You can of course go to the top and the view is absolutely breathtaking

We were actually in Paris during Bastille Day which is their day of independence. There was a fireworks show at the Eiffel Tower along with concerts. James Blunt actually performed! Thousands of Parisians took to the streets and it was a huge celebration! I would definitely recommend visiting Paris on July 14th. The energy is fantastic!

Versailles.. words cannot explain how BEAUTIFUL this palace is. We took a tour of the palace and were able to walk the halls that Marie Antoinette herself walked. The amount of history there is incredible.

The last stop on our trip was London. We took the Eurostar from Paris and we arrived in London and took a tour of the city.

I'm a sucker for London. Here is my list of things to check out while you are there:

1. Tower of London & Tower Bridge

2. Big Ben

3. The London Eye

4. Take the Jack the Ripper tour.

5. Buckingham Palace

6. Various Harry Potter filming locations

As we were touring the city we actually saw a huge crowd of people. We decided to check out what the fuss was all about and actually saw the Queen of England! Check out how fancy she is. :)

From there we sadly ended our trip and we headed home. I am so very thankful I was able to take this trip along with my best friend and cousin. I LOVE to travel and to learn about the history of these cities that are so much older then us over here in the US. Some overall tips I'd like you leave with are:

Pack warm (even if it's July): As you can probably tell by the pictures, it was cloudy everyday of our trip except for one (Versailles trip). It's not freezing or anything but it does get chilly. Bring jeans and some hoodies or light jackets and you will be fine.

Go to Museums: There is so much history and so much to learn about! There are fascinating museums and tours that you can take. Those things you learned about in school, you can actually visit where it all took place!

Public Transportation: Use it! It's so cheap and easy. There are buses and trains everywhere and you will cover a lot more sightseeing that way. You will also save on a lot of money.

Eat in small & local restaurants: I better not hear ANYONE say they ate a McDonald's while abroad *cringe* Check out where the locals eat. Believe me you'll eat some of the greatest foods there and you'll be surrounded by amazing people who have great stories to tell.

Take Tours: I understand you might want to go off on your own but believe me, take a general tour of the city on your first day. They can give you great tips for the rest of your trip. You get a general feel for the city and where things are, and you can knock out some places that you wanted to visit.

Check out your local college for trips: My 10 day trip included airfare, all public transport (buses, trains etc), breakfast, hotels, and 90% of the tours for under $3,000. For Europe in the summer time this is a great deal. They book everything for you and you have your trip set for you. You of course are given days of leisure to go off on your own, but if you are a young traveler (I was 19 at the time) it is nice to have guidance.

I am hoping to visit Europe again soon and go to countries like Italy, Spain, Ireland, and the UK again. I believe everyone should travel at least once abroad. It is such an eye opening experience and I am blessed that I could take part. I hope you enjoyed my travels and thanks again to Jenn for allowing me to share them here on her blog. :)

Guest Post: Road Trip on a Budget

2011-05-30T04:00:00.003-05:00

Hi friends! This is Nicole from Consider The Lilies. I’d like to thank Jenn for having me over, I’m so excited to share my experience of cross-country road tripping with you all!

Exactly one year ago, to the day, I was on the road making my way from California to Virginia.

To say I became familiar with I-40 east would be an understatement. For five days straight I listened to a distorted voice say “Keep left on I-40 east.”

The GPS...not my friend, she has a normal voice.

I was a little nervous to drive across the country in the summer time. I mean I’m from California, so all I hear about the Midwest involves tornadoes and crazy weather, so I braced myself for the worst.

The husband, who I refer to as “Mr”, is in the Army. Mr was in AIT last summer and it was just months before he was deploying to Iraq, so naturally I made the 2,900-mile road trip to spend my summer with him. One of his buddies from Basic was also going to AIT in Virginia and had a girlfriend who lived close by and wanted to move near Post. So we moved in together. She filled the townhouse with furniture, and by fill, I mean a kitchen table, beds, a TV and one chair. We lived like bums, and it was awesome. So all I had to pack were clothes and everyday necessities. She was the brains of the operation and I sort of just moved in. I couldn't have done it with out her! But that's another post in itself. I’m here to share some of my tips for a budgeted cross-country road trip and to say you should all try it at least once, and ONLY once :)

Tip # 1: Find a friend to make the drive with you. But, remember you will be in the car for up to (but not limited to) 9 hours a day for AT LEAST 5 days..with this person.

Tip #2: Pack a cooler full of non-perishables. We lived off of complimentary hotel breakfast fruits, peanut butter/jelly sandwiches, one subway sandwich and an occasional 49-cent taco bell burrito for 5 days. But we spent a total of $50 on food for the entire trip, so we didn’t complain.

Tip #3: Find cheap hotels, but read the reviews. If there are one or two negative reviews chances are it’s fine and you’ll make it through the night. You’ll probably only get 5 or 6 hours of sleep anyway so don’t bother searching for the 5 star Sheridan. Don’t forget to ask for discounts, we used AAA and saved %15 at both hotels we stayed in. [I wasn’t married at the time so I couldn’t use this yet, but keep in mind that most places give a military discount as well]

Tip #4: Try and think of friends you know who live across the country on your route. For two of the 4 nights we were on the road, we lodged with friends of ours who were nice enough to set up a bed and offer us a free meal.

Tip #5: Be prepared for delays and bad weather. We ran into a sand storm in Arizona after we had been on the road for only 3 hours. We had a very strict driving schedule because we both had to be across the country by a certain day or all our plans wouldn’t go through. We were held up in Arizona for 5 hours due to the sand storm though, so the next day we made up for loss time and pulled a 15 hour day on the road. We also hit a massive rain storm in Tennessee, I don’t know how you Midwesterners do it, those things are scary!

Tip #6: Soak up the scenery and state around you because it’s not likely you’ll ever see that part of the United States again!

So to sum it up, we made it across the country in 5 days exactly. We stayed in two hotels for under $50 a night (split between two people, it’s only $25 or so), stayed with friends for 2 nights, filled up on gas about every 6 or 7 hours [half our total cost went to gas], brought our own food, and saw parts of the country

I never thought I would, for a grand total of $750!

*Thanks to Jenn for having me over and to you for reading! I hope some of you saw how easy it really is to

road trip on a budget!

Guest Post: Our trip from Georgia to California - Military Style

2011-05-27T04:00:00.004-05:00

Hey, y'all! I'm so happy to be guest posting for the lovely Jenn today. My name is Stephanie, I blog over at Polos, Pearls, Pacifiers mainly about my Navy husband and now 2-year-old daughter! Come by, say hi, maybe even kick your feet up and stay awhile! Today, I'm going to be sharing a little story about having this small little southern girl that hardly ever left Georgia in her entire life move to the big city of San Diego... At the last minute.

My husband, Joseph, got word that he was going to be stationed in San Diego about halfway through his schooling, and despite my fears I was very excited. I hadn't seen my husband in over 6 months and I was so anxious to get this show in the road! The movers came and went in a flash, leaving my daughter and I living in an empty house with nothing but a couch for me to sleep on, a pack n' play for her, and a few toys for entertainment... Sometimes for both of us. This lasted for about a week. Until one night, while talking to Joseph on the phone, we both decided we were tired of this. We wanted to be together. We wanted to be a family again. So, on a whim, we decided I would get online and buy a one-way ticket to California and fly out the next night!

Luckily, despite our last minute decision, I had plenty of time to tell my family goodbye, get through security without a problem, and arrive at our gate with time to grab a bite to eat! It wasn't until we were actually on the plane, and bed time started to draw near that the fact that I was completely changing my one-and-a-half year-old's surroundings started to kick in. As much as I tried to entertain her with crayons, and books, and a portable DVD player, sometimes when a toddler is upset and tired, A TODDLER IS UPSET AND TIRED. I finally got her settled down, and asleep, and that's when I felt it... A warm, wet substance coming from my daughter's bottom. Yep, that's right. She peed on me. My daughter that I had just spent the last hour trying to get to fall asleep, peed on me. I'm pretty sure horror struck across my face, even though no one else in the flight could have known what had just happened! I couldn't move. She would only wake up and disturb the entire plane again! I didn't want the flight attendant coming back and asking me if I needed to walk the aisles again. So what did I do? I sat there. I sat there with my daughter's pee on my lap for the rest of those 3 hours that were left in the plane ride while she slept, well, like a baby. I didn't move until everyone else had gotten off the plane, smiling as they passed, then used her blanket to attempt to try and cover the spot. I could feel the eyes of people staring as I walked through LAX holding a sleeping toddler, carrying a bag, rolling a suitcase, with a huge wet spot on my jeans.

I walked through the airport for a good 20-25 minutes trying to find baggage claim, after getting lost at least 3 times trying to keep my head down and not make eye contact with any of the glaring eyes. I felt like I was living some awful dream, until I saw my husband. Everything was right again. I dropped my bags, ran as fast as I could, and put the one arm that wasn't carrying the sleepy one around him. It didn't matter anymore that my daughter had fussed, or peed on me, or the walk through the airport. Everything was right again. We were finally a family. We were home. And that was all we needed.

- Stephanie T.
Polos, Pearls, & Pacifiers

Guest Post: Big Moves from Greece to Germany

2011-05-25T04:00:00.014-05:00

Hi there! It's Katherine from Styleidoscope, all the way from Germany! It's such an honor to be here today and share with you my two cents. Jenn, sweetie, thank you so much for having me.

Since Jenn will be moving from beautiful Alaska to swingin' Texas, I thought I'd share with you guys my big move (from Greece to Germany), and give a few tips for any of you out there who are thinking to do the same. Ok, ok, Jenn has to cover a lot (A LOT!) more miles than we did, but then again, we drove through the Alps. That must count for something, right?

{Picture taken while stopping in the Dolomites during our 2-days moving trip}

First of all, we (that's the hubs and I) were thinking about moving from Greece to Germany since January 2010. I was born in Germany and lived there until I turned 18, so my experience and knowledge of the language would come in handy. August 2010 we took a two weeks trip to Bavaria, to see for ourselves how things were. November 2010 we moved.

{Leaving Greece. On the ferry, behind us, the harbor of Patras. }

We moved our lives from one country to another. And learned a lot of things along the way. About our relationship, our inner strength and our endurance. We have been living here in Bavaria for almost 7 months now, and love every single day of it. And, we are looking forward for the days to come.

{Images from our cute little town here in Bavaria. It's 25 miles away from Munich.}

So. Here are my personal most important tips to a successful “country-move”:

Plan ahead. Like waaay ahead. Example: We started packing boxes and furniture we would not take with us and storing it in safe places, in August. That's 3 months ahead. We also took care of things like canceling subscriptions, phone accounts, and all of the public, legal and administrative stuff 2-3 months prior to our departure. That way, we had more time to prepare the actual moving.

Make to-do lists. Long ones. For everything. And make sure to update these lists. There's nothing more satisfying than a “done!” to-do list.

Ask for help. No, you can not do everything on your own. Tame your inner control-freak and let friends and family help you: packing, planning, organizing, cooking while you run errands, cleaning the apartment/house you are moving out of etc.

Be strict and structured like a German. When selecting which things from your household will come with you and which don't, practicality, performance, efficiency, cost and common sense are the key words. No, you don't need them 5 inch heels you wore once and couldn't walk in closed shoes for a week after. Or all of the 7674699 pillows you have on your couch. Or the bulky couch itself. It helps if you prioritize according to cost, especially for bulky and/or heavy things, and according to sentiment too when it comes to other stuff. You can easily find affordable furniture anywhere, but you should take your expensive home equipment like TV, sound system, PC, printer, designer's items (lights for example), carpets, paintings, (and your loved memorabilia of course) with you. Also, as far as clothes are concerned it's the perfect opportunity to clean out your closet!

{Yes, that's my closet on the right. Small, huh? That's what I meant with closet cleaning and strict selection.}

5. Be sure you have all the legal documents and licenses that are needed for the move and the trip itself. Check out the regulations about the car, the trailer, pets etc. Prepare the car and trailer for the trip, have them checked and make an international insurance for them. Different countries have different regulations, especially when using their high-ways (fees). All I'm gonna say is Austria. Did we “forget” to pay the “vignette”? Could we have paid a 350$ fine if we were caught? *cough-cough* . Also, be sure you have a lot of fresh water with you and solid food like chocolate, cookies, brezels. Why? Because they taste good.

6. Be prepared for the worst case scenario. And enjoy. For example, we had it all planned out, arrived at 14.00 with the ferry from Greece in Ancona, Italy, from where it was just a 7 hours drive to Munich. But our GPS system thought to give us the sightseeing tour and decided that we drive all the way through the Dolomites and not on the German-Austrian-Italian Autobahn (high-way) “Brenner” to get to Munich. That we found out hours later, while it had become night and we were leaving several road curves behind us, gaining in altitude. The border to Austria was not in sight. We were tired and stopped at the first hotel we sighted, only to wake up the next day in freezing 25 degrees to this view from the hotel room's balcony window:

{Not bad for a non-programed stop, right?}

The first day in your new home. I have two words for you: food and bed. The most important things for day 1, are to have a full fridge and a bed where you can (finally!) rest. We hadn't both of them. Once we arrived, we unloaded the trailer and went straight to shop for groceries, then a bed and a mattress. I still remember us putting the IKEA bed together and completing the task successfully at 1'o clock in the morning! Aaaah, fun times!

{A short stop before the German-Austrian border}

{Our two male cats – they are brothers- . A piece of Greece we took with us!}

***

I hope you enjoyed reading! Again, a big “Thank you” to sweet Jenn for having me over here!

Moving & Traveling.

2011-05-22T20:27:00.001-05:00

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It's that time ladies & gents. Time to focus on moving things from the house, cleaning it up & heading out on one very long trip from Alaska to Texas. In disappointing news, my SUV will not be participating on this trip thanks to some flawed Toyota bs. However, it will be in good hands and I will see it in less than a year :( In the meantime I must focus on this trip while keeping my sanity. We made the final decision to take the West Coast route, through the desert (to visit my sisters in laws) before making our final stop in Texas. Wish me luck.

In the meantime, I'm looking for some guest bloggers. Specifically, travel related entries to go with the "theme" of my life until I settle down :) Have you been on a recent (or maybe not so recent) trip? Would you like to show us a view of your town? Travel tips? Anything similar? I'd love to have you for a guest blogger so send me an email to acupofjenn@gmail.com

And lastly, I'd love to have your votes for the Circle Of Moms Top25 Military bloggers. Scroll down, find my blog and click the orange thumbs up button. That's all :) Also feel free to check out the other blogs on that list and the other Top25 blog lists they have as well!

So for now it's a temporary farewell. You can find me on twitter during the whole journey and make sure to add my sister & I's food blog (which is very much under construction, tis' a temporary layout) where we will be documenting our foodie discoveries. I will try to document along the way whenever I can! See you at my next entry!

Road trip to Denali...

2011-05-19T04:00:00.003-05:00

This past week my little family and I took a road trip to Denali National Park, the home of America's tallest mountain, Mt.McKinley. This was my second trip to the park & my sisters first. After our last trip to Chena Hot Springs, we made the discovery that our boys were little travelers. Especially after making it into some sort of mission, like moose spotting. They didn't know that we were just trying to waste gas so that we could ship my sisters car. They wouldn't even have cared if we told them. They just knew they were looking for moose and having a picnic in the mountains. So we hopped in my little RAV4 (my car!) and sped off into the distance. The boys were even singing the "We're going on a trip" song by that moose on Nick Jr.

The wind was at full speed that particular day. It said it was 60 degrees but felt more like 45 to me. Which 45 is freezing when you just have a spaghetti strap and shorts on. We even tried to stop to take pictures at a viewpoint when leaving Fairbanks, but I could only get one where I'm half smiling and half awkward.

I wasn't leaving that viewpoint without a picture for this blog, so this is all you get! I need to stop using my camera as a point and shoot though because the only reason I took this was to show you the mountains in the background. Yea, I don't see any mountains here. Fail.

This is the bridge entering Nenana, AK. Let me just say that on our way back (when I was driving), I took a detour to look through the town. I'm not kidding when I say it reminded me of that little town on To Wong Foo. Cars were parked but not a dang thing was open and two older natives were sitting on chairs, people watching outside the laundry mat. The only excitement in that town was at the gas station, where a few teenagers were washing their trucks blaring P.O.D. The fact that they were blaring music I listened to more than 6 years ago, should tell you something. The guy at the gas station was tall, awkward and lanky and the lady at the cash register was plain & pregnant. I kind of felt like I was in the south for a tiny milisecond. There is something quite quaint about little towns like these, which I adore. A little scary but positively quaint.

We had another hour to go but the mountains were getting much closer. At one point, you reach a few miles where most of the trees have no leaves on either side of the road and look completely dead. Black, like they have been burnt. I never really got this area and to this day think it's completely strange. I did realize, that we hadn't hit any construction (which is usual for this area when the weather gets nice) and got pretty excited about that. Who doesn't get happy when you don't run in to construction on a trip? The boys were still looking for moose or really any wildlife but we didn't see a thing. However, they were thrilled when the mountains began to approach. I'll pretend its because they were overwhelmed by grand essence that mountains radiate but they were just ready for the picnic.

Our picnic did not go as planned. After entering the park, we discovered that the Visitors Center did not even open until the next day! So we had no idea where we were going or which way lead to inside of the park. We ended up taking a road that was leading us up a mountain and decided 10 minutes later to just turn around. I mean, we had no idea where to even pay a park fee. Not just that but it was much cooler in the mountains than Fairbanks. Freezing. So we parked at the closed visitors center and sat in the back of my SUV, covered up with blankets and ate our lunch.

I'm not sure why but my son never eats the meat in the Lunchables. Barely even eats the cheese. He generally just eats the crackers and fruit and it was no different this particular day. Oh, he did have a cup full of strawberries that he finished off as well. I guess I can't complain. We spent an hour or so there before deciding to pack up and leave. Of course we were hoping to see bears or something but no luck. There is never any luck. I'm starting to think nothing but moose live in Alaska.

So leaving the park, I'm sure you can guess what was standing on the side of the road:

Looks pretty dry huh? Wouldn't you know that the land is starting to get pretty green now. Crazy what 24 hours of sun and a week can do. I drove back the whole way (2hrs) and I'm pretty stoked about getting through it.

I have yet to know which mountain on our drive was Mt. McKinley. One day, I suppose.

And then of course when we are almost home, we find this guy munching around the corner from the house. Just as ugly as the rest of em.

Lastly, here are some random cell pictures from the past week: (Do you have Instagram? Find me at mydearjenn)

While you are here, would you mind just taking a second out of your day to vote for my blog? It will just take a second and all you have to do is click the button below & click the orange thumbs up button after that.

And if you are in need of finding new blogs, check out their Top25 lists!Oh and if you care to, feel free to check "LIKE" my blogs Facebook page found here -->MYDEARJENN.

Grant my last request...

2011-05-13T22:30:00.005-05:00

I always seem to write my holiday posts after every one else, to avoid you skimming through my entry to avoid the hype. Sneaky, I know. This past weekend has been the transition of my new life. My sister moved out of her place and in to mine, bringing with her my nephew and their 85lb lab Jasmine. I'm trying to love this dog you guys, I really am. It's not her fault that she's so monstrous. Or that she sheds so damn much. I hate dog hair, I really do. I loathe dog hair. I'm insulted when it gets on my clothes and my eyes start to itch. I've lived with Emery (my bichon) for so long, that I've been so spoiled. Jasmine also seems to follow me wherever I go and her big thick tail slaps me like a whip. She already chewed up 6 of my pups toys, 3 of them new! Emery seems to be happy to have a playmate but this mom is trying to adjust to it. Also, my nephew can be a bit on the crazier side compared to my son & combining them together can be a little stressful. My nephew seems to be my sons getaway to express his crazy side. So like I said, this past weekend was one full of adjustments. Because if anyone knows me, I have never taken my privacy or quiet house for granted. I'm a hermit. Let's hope I can adjust properly or at least just enough to survive the remainder of the year :)

The day before Mothers Day, we just ended up at the park. The weather was beautiful and I just really wanted the fresh air.

Usually, holidays don't feel the same when the hubby isn't around. They are generally like every other day. Mothers Day is no exception but I tried to take advantage of it being my "special" day. It didn't feel like that at all. My mind seemed super stressed and wired and I really just wanted to hide from the world. Somehow I got through it. The day started off by seeing the first moose of the summer! Which is weird because on this SAME weekend last year, I saw my first moose of the summer (actually year, life whatever) then as well!

Somehow after spotting these moose, we got the big idea to take a drive to Chena Hot Springs in the hunt for spotting animals & get a little site seeing in because we've never been out that way. So we asked the kids if they were up for it & they gave us the go ahead. We stopped at the first gas station that finally popped up (and probably the only one) and grabbed a few snacks and drinks.

Then we headed out to the open road. Needless to say, there was NO wildlife. Barely any scenery but the scenery we did get was very pretty. At one point mid-trip we stopped at a local campsite on the Chena North Fork River & let the boys run around and throw rocks. It was very serene.

My sister & nephew hanging out on the rocks.

On our way back, we spotted this family by the side of the river. They really look like they are part of some sort of SUV commercial, right?!

We finally got home and the boys were tuckered out so they spent the rest of the night recharging. This is their idea of recharging:

and at 9 oclock, these showed up on my doorstep thanks to my husband:

Instagram makes them look old but trust me, the looked and smelled wonderful. I hope you all had a fantastic Mothers Day!

Look at me now.

2011-05-10T03:18:00.007-05:00

I have a real life Army family. I'm the oldest of 4, with three over the age of 20. We are all (besides my baby sister) married to Army men. It just happened that way really. This is what 3 sisters do in their spare time when their men are away . Or heck, even when their men are at home. Doing webcam karaoke to Look At Me Now and acting completely ridiculous. I'm not sure how we always get to such ridiculous points in our online conversations but it is honestly just how we are. As much as I want my son to be an only child, I do have to admit that having siblings is pretty awesome. Come rain or shine, my sisters will still claim me even after all the dumb things I do. Whether its drawing mustaches on myself, wearing rainbow pantyhose with shorts or anything that normal people wouldn't do, they still have my back. They are so use to my antics that my sister doesn't even notice when I'm dancing erratically in the car anymore, even though everyone at the intersection is watching & pointing. I'm so grateful to have them as my sisters and couldn't have picked out better ones myself, even if I had to :) Feel free to be entertained by our ridiculousness below:

Excuse the lagging. Skype isn't very webcam friendly here in Alaska. Oh and if you are sensitive to bad words, please forgive my cursing. Not that it matters. We are listening to the explicit version of the song on here & the song definitely cussed way more than I did! Haha.

Speaking of webcams, did you check out my last post? I totally vlogged. My sister found her actual camera so I'm pretty sure there will be future (more interesting) videos to come in the future :)

Holy Mother, I Vlogged.

2011-05-07T00:30:00.001-05:00

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So after all this trouble I've gone through in the past few months, I finally got a vlog to upload. If you follow me on twitter, you might know how angry I've become with my webcam, vlogging and trying to upload. Well worry no more. I have finally vlogged. Please excuse the lag around the 2 minute mark or so and keep with it. It will eventually quit and go back to normal. I am NOT redoing this video for the millionth time, so you guys will have to take what I give you for now :) I know it's not the best of all vlogging videos and I say a few choice words a lot but gosh darn it, I vlogged.

Oh & vote for me?

Blogging on Pause.

2011-05-03T00:00:00.001-05:00

I'm forcing myself to take a break from blogging until I take my test. I have too much to do until we leave here soon & this is #1 on my list. Hopefully, the next time you'll see me on here, I'll finally be a legal driver. Wish me luck!

R.I.P Patrick

2011-05-01T20:12:00.001-05:00

My husband and I adopted Patrick last year. We knew that he was over 2 years old when we took him in. Hamsters never live much longer than that. He was the sweetest little hamster. Let us pick him up, never would bite and loved the attention we gave him.

I walked in to my husbands game room today to see Patrick laying weird on the bottom of his cage. His stomach was sunk in like he was deflated. About a minute passed and he tried to breath. I knew he was taking his last breaths. I spent 20 minutes laying down beside his cage so he would know that he wasn't dying alone. Yes, a tear or two came out of my eyes. My hands stood still on the glass and I kept calling out Patrick, hoping he would jump up and say "JUST KIDDING!" It sounds ridiculous but when I love something, I love it hard & I do love animals. Even little hamsters. He would have been 3 in the next few months. I hope he had a good little life.

When I say "Lower 48", I feel like a snob.

2011-04-25T18:13:00.001-05:00

I never realized how far I am from the rest of civilization.

Nothing like a big ole' map to put things into perspective.

Slow and steady wins the race

2011-04-25T00:00:00.001-05:00

I took this picture at 7:30 pm. It is currently (as I am typing this) 58 degrees. 58 degrees!!!! The snow in our driveway melted much faster than expected and the green on the trees are getting much richer in color. This means I'm getting so much closer to my final destination, Texas.

I hope to leave mid-May but June 1st is our actual date. Keep your fingers crossed that mid-May happens. Especially because I am DYING to go to Mudbug Madness at the end of May. I can just taste the juice from sucking the life out of a crawfish head, dribbling down my chin & the sting from the spices slathered all over my fingers.

I mean seriously. Look at all those little critters waiting for me to suck their heads & gobble up their butt meat. If you've never eaten a crawfish, you probably think I'm thinking dirty right now when REALLY it is how you eat them :) If I DO NOT make it to Mudbug Madness, you better BELIEVE it will be one of the first things I eat when I get home. I haven't had crawfish since right before we left when my dad cooked some. Sweet baby Jesus can't even help my urge to control myself when I get around these babies. *slaps face*

That's enough. I've gotten off track. It's just one of the only things I miss about where I grew up. By the way, did you know that I've taken a poll? About my accent. Apparently, if people didn't know I was from Texas they would fully guess I was from Louisiana. I had no idea that my dialect was a mix between twang and cajun! Maybe one of these days I'll vlog (trust me, I've been trying) and you can judge for yourself.

When I'm not torturing myself with the sight of little red seafood critters, I'm packing. Slowly but surely, I've been packing.

Which packing ALWAYS creates a mess. A mess that I hate cleaning up. Heck, you know I hate cleaning. I told you a few posts ago that I was a slob!

I'm having to rearrange my closet because I have no drawers anymore. The bigger items are being packed away which includes my dresser. You never really know how much crap you really own until you move. No lie, I am giving away or selling HALF of everything in my house. Especially the big pieces to make room for new ones when I come back. There was literally no available storage in town but we got lucky and scored two 10x15's. That was the biggest available anywhere. So, I have to shove what I can in that space and hope for the best.

If I'm not packing, I'm tending to this very clingy creature who seems to act like I've been gone for years every time I leave:

Doesn't she look like a puppy in this picture?! She is over a year old. Obviously, she is aging gracefully. Oh and I also found the time to cut my extensions. I tried to make a vlog about it (I stayed up until the sun came up) but my webcam lags so bad. I almost threw my computer out of the window. I would to if it didn't have over 4000 pictures and $2000+ worth of software on it. Oh well. Here is the outcome of that process:

I really like this length (click here if you want to see the length before). I still think I need to see a pro (thank goodness for friends who are hairdressers) but for now it will do. It just looks and FEELS so much better. Lastly, MyDearJenn now has an FB page if you'd like to check that out. I also announced the winner of the giveaway on the FB page as well. Hope you all have a great Easter weekend!

Ending this post at 8:30 and yes, it is still bright outside. Over and out.

The Urge to Splurge

2011-04-20T02:15:00.003-05:00

I like to believe that I am a natural born thrifter. My heart always got excited with the thought of hand me downs, even as a child. Which comes in handy during deployments. You see, shopping is my coping mechanism for stress. During stressful times, I always get the urge to splurge. Please do not confuse this with guilt shopping. Guilt shopping is horrible. I have been through such a phase in my life & hope to never go back. What is guilt shopping? It's where you decided to splurge but seconds/hours later decide that you made a mistake and return your item. Maybe you feel as though you are undeserving of the item? That's how I always felt when I went shopping and I discovered I was guilt shopping. I do not do that anymore. Over time I've realized that I do deserve items that I buy, as long as I'm making a thorough decision. This is where thrifting comes in.

This past weekend, I knew I had to occupy my mind or I would go crazy. Saturday night, my sister & I went to see Scream 4. I'm the kind of person that has to see the rest of a series if I've seen the original. Which is also why I'm avoiding Harry Potter. Good grief there are just so many movies in that series! Anyway, Sunday I went out with my dear friend Sasha to Value Village. It was her first time there and it was obviously my trillionth. I felt semi-bad for her because she had no idea that I am a detailed shopper.

I have a thrifting method. I start out going through every department. I sift pretty fast through all of the clothing items. I throw all the items that are Yes's & Maybes in my cart. After I'm done looking through all of the departments, I go to my little corner of the store and divide the items in to two categories: Will I really wear this & I change my mind. After that, I take the WIRWT category in to the dressing room. Yes, I try on every item. They have to not only be good quality and fit but they have to feel good on my body as well. I only buy good quality clothes that I know will stay put after a few washes. I'm picky like that. This whole process takes about 1 1/2-2 hours but it helps me to make sure I have no regrets at checkout.

I also took this time to sport my Luxy extensions out in public:

Every time I go there, I always try to have something in mind that I'm looking for. In this case, I was looking for a pair of oxfords. Black ones would be fine (even though I already have a pair) but I really wanted brown ones. The last time I went to VV, I came back with not only a black purse but an almost identical brown one as well. So now, I have an obsession with having both options. Actually it's not an obsession, it's more of a necessity. Everybody should have both colors for everything in their wardrobe. Not only was I looking for brown oxfords, I've been looking for nude pumps as well. Let me tell you, I NEVER find shoes at VV. I've never even bought shoes at VV because I'm kind of picky when it comes to that & they never have what I'm looking for. This time not only did they have the oxfords I was looking for in my size but two additional pair of shoes as well!

Not only were these shoes in my exact size, they are in such amazing shape! I could not believe my eyes when I looked at the shoe shelf. I NEEDED black pumps. The ones I have are real leather, two sizes too small & have scuff marks on the bottom. I paid 60 bucks for those leather heels. Guess how much I paid for these black pumps? They were originally 6.99 but the gray tags (which is what it had) were half off that day!

I knew that when I tried them on at the store that they fit but I never knew how well they fit until we got home. All of these shoes felt like they were made for my feet. I'm still dumbstruck by how in love I am with this purchase. Also while there, I grabbed a few summer tops and a belt that I am so happy I got my hands on:

There are three additional t-shirts missing from this pile because I had already worn them by time I took this picture. I'm actually wearing one right now as I type this. I was so happy about my purchase that I actually looked forward to doing laundry. This is how I do laundry in this household:

If you had a date with Robert Palmer & Mrs.Meyers, you'd be excited too, don't ya think? Anywhoo, the total amount of my purchase cost $60. However, I had a 30% off coupon which brought me down to $45! I was super relieved when I saw that. The cashier was in a crappy mood & I was this close to saying something about it but I just wanted to get the heck out of there. Oh and look what other gem I ~~stalked~~ found:

[photo by Melissa]

Yes, I spotted this sexy beast while in my little corner debating my clothes. I didn't care how much it was, I wanted it. I asked the man if it was priced and he said he hadn't done it yet, so I just stood beside it sorting through my purchase. This lady had her evil eye on it but I made SURE she knew that it was mine. After awhile, I figured that I wouldn't be around by the time they priced it (not to mention I had no way to take it home) so I decided to leave it. I was so sad that I had to leave such a pretty piece of furniture behind but I'm moving anyway so it would have stayed in storage. I called Melissa, however, and made sure she knew she needed to get there and swipe it up before anyone else could. And guess what? She sure got her butt up, drove down to VV and took this baby home. I'm so glad it ended up in good hands :)

Before I end this post, I have a few things to talk about! First thing is first. I finally have my own domain! No longer is this blogs address acupofjenn.blogspot.com but it is now www.mydearjenn.com! I went through blogger again and it took mere seconds to finalize. I could not believe it. So I'm super excited about that! Second, if you are a military family or know of a military family, do NOT FORGET to ENTER MY GIVEAWAY which ends this Friday! Lastly because I love her, go check out my lovely friend Lauren's etsy shop. She makes cute greeting cards and even does portrait vectors. She did mine awhile back and made me in to a cat :) Why a cat? Because ever since we've been friends, she's had the personality of a butterfly and I've had the personality of a sex kitten. <---It's true but we are two peas in a pod when it comes down to it.

I have her working on a super secret project for my blog & even for my house. I'll let you guys in on that secret when the time comes :) Oooh and one more thing! I have a super exciting blog project that I'm creating with my sister and cannot wait to share it with you guys! Eeeek! Hope you are all having a great week!

Luxy Hair Extensions Review

2011-04-17T02:36:00.006-05:00

Okay guys. I know a few of you have been waiting on this long & overdue review. I mentioned about two months ago, that I had ordered some Luxy Hair extensions. I ordered the Super Luxurious 160g set in color #4. Usually my hair is much darker and I would have ordered #2 but since I've laid off on dying it, I thought this would be my color. After reviewing their videos on youtube, I tdecided this would be the closest to my hair color. I received the package within a week (which is great for Alaska) and was super excited to try on my hair. The quality is superb and I'm so happy that I chose to buy this particular brand. I had done glue in extensions in the past & they completely ripped out my hair each time. I was so happy to have found clip ins online. Now they do cost $139 dollars, so this an investment. It is 100% Remy Human Hair extensions. The best of the best in extensions.

After opening my package however, I discovered that the color was just a bit lighter than my actual hair color. In the same family but you can tell the difference. I'm glad I did not purchase the #2 though because my hair is a deep chestnut medium brown. That is my natural hair color. There is no in between color from #2 to #4. I was slightly disappointed that I had to dye these extensions & could not exchange them because I already took them out of the package. So I went to my local store & bought the hair color that was most similar to mine by L'oreal. You have to use two boxes every time you dye because not only is it thick hair, it's 20 inch hair. Yes, super long. After the first time I dyed them, I discovered that this might be virgin hair so I had to leave the dye on for 40 minutes instead of 25. The color turned out ALMOST the same as mine but needed to darken a LITTLE bit more. I ended up waiting an entire month (so much was going on in my life) until I did it again, which was last night. I bought the same color & just dyed it one more time for 40 minutes. Now the color is perfect.

The length IS dramatic. It's pretty much to my belly button. While I really love the length, you can see a slight difference from my hair length to the length of the extensions when straight. I've tried my best to blend it as well as I could. I wasn't fully expecting a miracle because medium/light brown hair is kind of hard to conceal. It reflects so much light unlike blonde hair or black hair which seems to blend easily. Throw in the fact that I've dyed my hair a few times and you understand. However, I am not disappointed. I love these extensions (now that they are my color). Luxy Hair also has tons of hairstyle tutorials you can do with your extensions on their youtube channel. I cannot wait to try them out. I also plan on cutting them a bit more to my chest in order to get a full blended look. I'll make sure to show you guys the results of that.

The bottom line is, these are the best extensions that I've ever had in my hair. The are so full and luxurious & even though I had a slight setback with color, I would still recommend these to anyone. Not to mention they are clip ins & are much more affordable than sew ins & MUCH better than gluing them in.

Excuse the messy mirror. As you can see, my length is hard to blend in when the extensions are so long. I'm sure it would be different if my hair was shorter or a tad longer. On the right, you can see they blend much better when they are curled. As a matter of fact, when they are curled, you can barely even notice them. If I put my hair a certain way when straight, they look much more blended which I didn't get a chance to take a picture of. Either way, I really like them & will be wearing them much more often.

I am in no way getting paid for this review from LuxyHair.com. I bought these extensions with my own money and these are my own, honest thoughts on the product without any financial influence.

PS. Make sure to check out MY CURRENT GIVEAWAY which is specifically for military families.

One long year to go

2011-04-13T16:15:00.004-05:00

I really don't like this picture but it's the only one we took. You have to have at least one picture from the beginning of the deployment & one picture from the homecoming no matter how crappy they are. So here we are on day one of Deployment #3 for this family. I'm not sure why but it went much easier than expected. There weren't a ton of tears at the bag drop off. We were just so ready to get it over with. Very tired of the hurry up and wait time period. The hardest part of a deployment is saying goodbye. You know you're going to be sleeping alone tonight.

When we got home, it was almost time for bed. As I reminded my son to go get his jammies on, I think it started to hit him. You see, I don't put my son to bed. His daddy usually does that job. All of a sudden, when I told him it was time for bed he screamed "I WANT MY DAD!" and threw his Daddy Doll across the room. I told him that we can call him before bed time so I dialed his number. He didn't answer but his voicemail did. He has one of those voicemails that tries to trick you in to thinking he picked up the phone "Hello...What's Up?". When my son heard his Daddy's voice he started crying, "Dad, I want you. I love you. I'm going to bed. Call me tomorrow." I got him ready for bed, sprayed his Daddy Doll (which he never use to sleep with if his dad was home) with his Dad's cologne & tucked him in. His Daddy called back 10 minutes later but our son was already passed out. It was an exhausting day.

Anyway, I have so much to do. I wish I had more detail to the day but it's just exhausting to think about. I'm trying to move ahead and think positive. I'm slowly but surely packing up some things around the house. I went through a cleaning spree on the days leading up to D-Day. I guess to keep my mind off of it. Now I'm going through a packing spree and getting rid of all that I can. I'm just ready to get to Texas. I have so many things to look forward to. I feel bad though because what does my husband have to look forward to besides coming home? That's one of the hard parts about deployment...trying not to feel guilty for continuing on with your life & all the fun stuff it entails. My summer looks quite exciting compared to last summer and I don't want to feel guilty about that. However, there is no way to avoid that feeling. Let's hope this deployment goes even better than the last one (which was actually quite easy) and that this next year will fly by.

NOW, on to something super exciting. It's been months since I've had a giveaway and I decided to do one that has to do with what I am going through. Generally giveaways are created to generate a little publicity to the blog but this one is for a specific group of people. This one is specifically for military families. Can you guess what I am giving away?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I'm giving a way a $50 gift certificate to DaddyDolls.com! Have you been thinking about getting a DaddyDoll for your little one to help them cope with their Daddys (or Mommies) being away? $50 bucks can buy you TWO Daddy Dolls. Now is the chance for you to win! Not just that but if you're not interested in a Daddy Doll, they have a whole bunch of other items you can select from. Take a look at them here. But really, that's not all. The winner of the giveaway will not only win a gift certificate but they will ALSO win a Support Our Troops bracelet from my friend Stephi at Clover Stone Designs.

So it's really two giveaways in one. One for a little one (or two) that you care about and one for yourself. Unless of course, YOU want the doll for yourself ;) I know how hard deployments can get & even being away from each other for field times and anything else. I just really wanted to give back to the strong community that I am a part of & the people online who have given me so much support. All I truly require is that you are a follower of this blog.

To gain extra entries you can also:
*Become a fan of Clover Stone Designs on Facebook
*Tweet about this giveaway: I just entered to win a gift certificate to DaddyDolls.com & a bracelet (@CloverStoneDsgn) from @mydearjenn's blog giveaway!
*Blog about it
*Post on your Facebook

And make sure to leave a comment for each thing you do. Also, please spread the word to any military families you know if this giveaway is not your thing :) Giveaway will close April 22nd at midnight, Alaska time <3 Good luck!

The time is drawing near...

2011-04-06T23:41:00.002-05:00

I forgot to mention this past week I participated in the March of Dimes. It was very cold outside but as luck would have it, we got to do it in the University of Alaska-Fairbanks Rec Center. It wasn't a HUGE turnout but it was over with before you knew it. We started out with some Jazzercise. I kind of felt a little out of place because my moves were so awesome compared to others. Honestly, I was working it. Grinding & getting in to the music. It was ridiculous. Then we hit 24 laps around the gym which we were told to walk. Even though it was suppose to be a 5k & Amber swears it was 3 miles, I still say it was a mile. I could have sworn the lady in charge said it was a mile over the loud speaker. Not to mention, I've ran 3 miles & that didn't feel close. I did get a decent burn & got to chit chat with my friends which is always great. In addition, I got to catch up with my sweet friend Suzy who is heading back to the states as well. She plans to run a race in Fort Worth & I hope to see her there to cheer her on.

When I got home after the March of Dimes, I got ready and had a Skype date with Tasha & Stephanie! As a matter of fact, the picture above was one I took after the date because I failed to take a picture of us chatting. I'll get a picture of us next time because we have another date this weekend. Ps. I'm so glad they didn't bail out like I was expecting them to. I'm not sure why I expected that. Maybe because we all seem like introverts & meeting for the first time is kind of scary? Whatever it was, they didn't bail and they makes them super cool in my book :) I can't wait to hang out with them this summer.

Now on to why I was posting in the first place:

Well folks, its almost that time. We have an official bag drop off time so it's now real. We were just going to say goodbye at the house but decided to see him off at the buses or plane or wherever they will depart this time. We're just a few days away from the actual d-day but it's as close as ever. I've been trying to comprehend whats about to happen but it's just kind of painful to think about. I don't think I took it this hard the last two deployments. I guess it's because this one has such an iffy future. So much is suppose to happen afterward. We're trying our best to inform our son of whats about to happen but he doesn't like to talk about it. Poor boy is only 3 and knows something is going on. After d-day is over with, I'll be starting to get our house together to hand back over to the landlord. Sure, I have about a month and a half to go but taking it day by day will be less stressful. I'm such a procrastinator. Plus, it will be giving me more time to focus on one thing: GETTING MY LICENSE. I'm going to try to keep myself busy, mentally after the goodbyes but it's kind of hard when you have a government shutdown looming over your head.

On a better note, the drive through Canada might not happen! We might be shipping our cars instead and flying home!!! YAY! The faster the better, I say. I'm ready to get to that burning Texas sun.

Lastly, next week I will be having a very special giveaway in honor of this month. April is Month of the Military Child & this giveaway is something very near and dear to my heart. So make sure you stay tuned for that :) Have a great weekend.

Ahoy, Matey!

2011-04-05T19:34:00.001-05:00

Guess what came in my son's easter basket this year?

What?! You let him open his basket already?! Why yes I did. You see, in this household, we don't really "celebrate" Easter. Then why did you get him an easter basket? Because it was 9.99 and had PIRATE stuff in it! Come on people! If you haven't discovered the awesomeness of being a pirate, you are missing out. Don't let my son hear about it either. If he ever found out that you didn't believe in the awesomeness that is being a pirate, he would probably "make you walk the plank." After all, he is a professional pirate. It's as offensive as calling wrestling fake. Thanks to the Backyardigans and Jake & the Neverland Pirates, being a pirate is now incredibly easy. Here is what you've got to do:

Find some pirate gear. An eye patch is a necessity in order to call yourself Captain. My son said so.

Practice your pirate terms in the mirror.

My sons favorite is "Make them walk the plank!" but he also likes to yell "Ahoy, matey!" when we walk in to the room.

Threaten someone with your hook hand.

In this case, Emery was the victim. However, I found some "golden doubloons" and quickly found a hook slapping them out of my hands. I was also verbally threatened with "Don't you touch my treasure. Do you want to walk the plank?" and was directed towards my bathtub because you know, there are sharks in there.

Go find some treasure.

While you're on the search, throw in some scary "Arrghhs" if anyone gets in your way. If you're lucky, all those years training to be a captain will get you a compass to find the gold doubloons much faster.

Once you find the treasure, you are officially a pirate. And if you want to be ten times cooler, you can always change your Facebook language to Pirate. That's probably the easiest & cheapest way anyway.

By the way, did you know September 19th was International Talk Like a Pirate Day? I swear, people make a day to celebrate anything.

Reminiscing...

2011-04-02T02:24:00.004-05:00

That's me & my dad. This is one of my favorite pictures that I own. Not only does it show the proof my family's love for the Longhorns (his hat) but it really shows my happiness. This was some time after my parents divorced when I was 5. I know, happiness after a divorce? Yes. Sometimes, some people just aren't really meant to be married. Most people are embarrassed of their childhood photos but they are my favorite pieces of memories that I own. My teenage year photos are another story & will be probably shared some time in the future. I think I am the sole owner of a handful of photos of my sisters and I from our kiddie years. I swear, I have scanned them & re-scanned them over and over just to make sure we'd have at least one to look back on.

I have nothing to write about tonight. All these emotions building up for my husbands departure have gotten me feeling crummy. This month is going to suck, no doubt. So many people in my life are disappearing this month that the sound of any slow song feels like it's stabbing me in the heart. That's why I don't even listen to slow music. It's also probably why electro-pop and techno are my favorite genres & I don't like movies that make you cry. Crying hurts. So as always, I try to avoid it. I needed a pick me up however & broke out my picture box from the closet. So guess what you are getting? A throwback photo post. Enjoy!

Obviously, I was sporting these glasses before anyone ever knew who Kanye West was.

Guess which baby I am? Actually this is kind of funny. My cousin (on the left) is mixed exactly like me (half white, half mexican) but her and her brother came out with the darker skin. Not fair at all. I'm not sure my dad even looks like a mexican in any of these old photos. I always think he looks like one of those Italian pizza guys from the 80's. By the way, did anyone ever really like those hideous brown shaggy carpets? What were they thinking?

A picture of my sister and I (left) with our golden Texas tans. How adorable were we? Also, why am I reading the phone book? Okay sure, I would read the phone book for fun when I was younger but I'm sure there is a better explanation for this. I mean, I do have a pen in my hand. Anyone else ever look up your last name & wonder if any of the people listed were related to you?

Halloween with my sisters and my cousin.

I'm not sure whose smart idea it was (I think it was my mother) to dress us up in little Aggie uniforms but we talk about it every time we see this picture. However, to her benefit, we did look cute. My cousin looks so adorable in that Spiderman costume, which was probably 2 sizes too big for him.

I am seriously rockin' that blue bathing suit.

My first and only ever broken arm. Which happened after playing in the sprinklers (photo above). My son looks exactly like this when he is sleeping. People like to say my son looks like my husband but he really looks like me. Shhh, don't tell. Don't want to hurt the hub's ego. Because really, what man doesn't want their son to look like them?

I guess I'll stop it right there and leave the rest for a later date :)

The Pro's & Con's of this specific week

2011-03-28T10:29:00.001-05:00

Let's start from last Sunday to this past Sunday, shall we?

The Pro's:

I discovered a whole network of DFW bloggers. DFW bloggers that I will eventually meet. That's right, I will finally attend a blogger meet up sometime this year!
My self tanner hasn't made me orange...yet.
Emery got herself groomed. Which is kind of a con as well but more of a pro since it was needed.
The local temperatures have gotten much warmer (high 30's, low 40's) & the snow started to melt away.
Had a dream last night that I talked to God. As weird as it was, it was incredibly needed. Sure Jesus was talking to me through a Christmas ornament on a Christmas tree but it gave me comfort.
I redid the look of my blog. It's my favorite so far!
My son & all of his cuteness. Especially his imagination. The picture above is of him telling me that he's swimming with the sharks.

The Con's: (warning, TMI info lies ahead)

I had a hangover. (I know I already posted about it but we're starting from last Sunday to yesterday)
Emery got shaved TOO much at the groomers.
I got huevos and gave myself a bikni wax. Not as painful as I thought (pro) but ended up leaving my skin red and burned for days like a sun burn. We all know what happens to the skin of sun burns when they start to heal. Yea...I'm leaving it to the pros next time.
Somehow, the bikini wax caused me to give myself an ingrown hair where the sun don't shine. Oh wait, turns out it's not an ingrown hair. It turned in to a freaking boil!
On top of the burn & boil, I ended up with either the flu or strep throat. I'm not sure which one it is. I'm starting to get over it but as I am writing this, I still have a sore throat. Hubby brought me some drinks, meds & a magazine on day one. Sister got up on her day off & took me to the store to get meds on day 3 & even got me a few packs of Emergen-C. Sure, I haven't gotten any rest because of the pain in my throat (seriously, I've had barely any sleep for two days) but at least its good to know I have such a great family.
Hubby will be leaving for the big D much sooner than I had hoped for. Much sooner.
I had a horrible dream about my husband being KIA. Woke up crying.
Big Love had it's series finale. I get tired of shows I LOVE ending. I fell on the floor with tears because I'm a cry baby like that & b/c the ending kind of didn't go like I expected.
After all the snow started to melt, it decided to snow again, yesterday with plans to snow more the next few days. At least the temps are still scheduled to be warm?

So as you can see, my con's list heavily outweighed my pro's list. Let's just hope this week goes by so much better.

My Poor Emery! [first video post]

2011-03-24T19:28:00.006-05:00

My dearest, furry puppy dog is no more.

This past weekend, we took her to her first grooming appointment. Apparently, giving her baths only matted up her long curly hair. We had no idea that this is what happens with Bichon Frises. The groomer looked at us in disbelief. Like we were idiots. I looked up everything about Bichon Frises when we got her, besides grooming! What was I thinking? How could I only think baths would be enough? I have never had experience with curly haired dogs much less long haired dogs. The last dog we had was a chihuahua! The best no maintenance dog on the planet! Turns out Bichon Frises are a bit of show dogs and that hair needs to be groomed. I feel like a dummy. We treated her like our baby but never thought to brush her hair. How could that have slipped our minds? Now the poor girl has to suffer. Because apparently doggie conditioner doesn't exist? Or it doesn't help to get the tangles out? I'm sorry groomer lady but her hair was not that bad! There were just a few tangles on the bottom! She acted like the world was going to come to an end when she showed us how short she was going to trim her. This was no trim, by the way. This was annihilation of her luscious locks! She now looks like a temporary chihuahua. Poor thing is not use to this and wears a jacket IN the house!

She cuddles with me a lot more now though, which is kind of a plus.

I'm just counting down the days when my little pups hair goes back to normal. She's a Bichon Frise! She just doesn't look right without that big poofy hair. I swear, I could not recognize her when the groomer handed her to me. She looked so happy to see me and practically jumped out of the groomers hands. I wonder if she saw herself in the mirror & became embarrassed at her nakedness...

By the way, I've completely jumped on the video making bandwagon thanks to Megan's cute videos! I've only made two (the first one was a disaster) so far and can't wait until they get better. Here is the second one I made. It's pretty simple. I took videos of our day taking Emery to the groomer & this is what became of them. I promise better next time. Enjoy!

I also promise to use Vimeo next time. Seems much more classy to upload home videos from there than Youtube. I couldn't help it though. I was trying to use the fastest site to upload & it turned out to be Youtube.

Go Karts, Football & too much to drink

2011-03-22T03:15:00.004-05:00

I just realized I never posted about this weekend. Or heck, even this week. My husband is currently on leave & my family and I are spending time together. By spending time together, I really mean my hubby is currently on CallofDuty & I'm twittering away to the awesome people in twitterville. I never thought I'd like twitter but it's starting to prove to be incredibly useful. Okay okay, so he doesn't spend ALL of his time on CallofDuty. Half of his time has been spent watching that ANNOYING March Madness mess going on. Someone save me!

By the way, how do you guys deal with preparing for deployments? It always seems that the hubby and I's routine is to pretend it isn't happening. I know a lot of people like to spend "time together" but we seem to just act like it's not even going on! Either that or we've just gotten use to it being apart of our lives that it really just seems like it's normal. I don't like the idea that it seems normal to us but what can you do? We keep saying how ready we are to just get it over with. That cannot be more true. The sit and wait game is dreadful. Thankfully we have a funny little 3 year old to keep us in check. I swear, ever since my husband got back from NTC, he has been bursting in vocabulary. Words that I don't even say that he knows. Maybe I should thank his V-Reader?

So as the time together is starting to draw to a close, we decided to venture out in to the town this past week. Right down the road from my house is a tiny indoor go kart place. $5 dollars for 7 minutes of riding on a tiny track. Whatever, it's entertainment right? We had the extra change & really wanted to spend time with friends. My son had a BLAST so really that's all that mattered :)

My posse also ventured out & played a bit of laser tag. They think they are cool like that :)

My sister even let my son run around with her and let him "kill" people. I could hear her screaming inside "SHOOT HIM!!!!" Honestly, the place was kind of entertaining & I'd go back again if I had chump change laying around.

WEEKEND RECAP:

FRIDAY night we went out to eat with friends

which was then followed by a local IFL (Indoor Football League) game against the Allen Wranglers (the IFL football team of the area in Texas that I'm from!)

This was the beginning of the game. The game was much more packed 30 minutes after the game started. Especially our side, the wet side. Our local team here is called the Fairbanks Grizzlies. I really wanted to get in to the game but really didn't enjoy it. I guess I'm just a spoiled Texan who loves real football? I don't know. I prefer the hockey games here though so at least I have some sort of sporting entertainment to enjoy!

I didn't take this picture because of the mascot. I took it for that kid in the yellow's FACE! Seriously! He was the most excited person to greet that man in a suit!

& yes, my sister & I coincidentally matched our boys in their Cowboys jerseys that we bought for them before we left Texas :)

Now let's talk about Saturday night. I had all these plans to go out to the local bar & get my country on. That did not happen. Everyone seemed to bail out! I wanted to wear my "sexy" outfit this weekend! And by sexy outfit, I mean anything with the black skirt & combat boots! That didn't happen either. However, I had already scheduled my sons babysitter & did not want to cancel. So the hubby and I just decided to go spend a few hours with each other & scarfing down dinner at our favorite sushi place.

STOP! Do you guys just realized what you've witnessed? The first (real) picture of my husband on this blog. And guess what? I'll be introducing you more to my family in future posts. Seriously guys, consider yourselves lucky! I love you guys THAT much. This blog just got much more personal. [I guess my blogging rules are officially changing]

By the way, I got to meet Conni for the first time who is just as lovely as she seems on her blog!

This was my son's first time with a babysitter (someone OTHER than family) and he did SO WELL! I guess it helps that the babysitter was so pleasant and had a great vibe about her! So happy to have found someone like that for my son. Too bad we are moving but she'll be here when we get back :)

Back at home, after our son fell asleep, the hubby & I decided to take back a few drinks & play Trivial Pursuit. Let's just say the next day I woke up with a hangover. Now I know why drinking like that is a once in a blue moon thing. Yuck. Never again! <---That's what they always say.

The importance of bringing your "sexy back"

2011-03-18T18:12:00.004-05:00

Yesterday, I went to work out. As I was doing crunches for the millionth time, I started to cry. Not all out tears spewing on the floor but I was upset. I was upset at my flaw, my muffin top. I stopped everything I was doing & just laid on the floor mad at my flaw. I felt stupid. Here I am with a good shape body (while other people are struggling to lose 100's of pounds) and I'm upset about a little flab. A flab I got for birthing a 9 pound child naturally. In the middle of me being upset, you know what happened? A song on my playlist came on that I'd forgotten about. The Middle by Jimmy Eat World. Have you ever READ those lyrics? I could not BELIEVE that song was playing in the middle of my breakdown! I swear it seemed like a sign from GOD. It should be every woman's anthem when they are feeling down. So I marched upstairs, looked in the mirror & forgot about my stomach because I could see my thighs. My pretty little thighs. I pulled out a bag of clothes that my friend Amber got me and started messing around with outfits. I was determined to make a fashion post. What you guys got was the outfit above & this entry below where I couldn't stop rambling. Enjoy!

There is nothing worse for your self esteem than to discover that you've lost your "sexy". I'm not kidding. As a mother, my sexy card almost went in to hiding. I'm sure it would be different if I were single because I'm sure I'd be pulling that card out at least every weekend. Once you get married, over the years you start getting way too comfortable. Especially during the early years of having children. You lose a lot of your "me" time because you're not sure how to balance everything out properly. My balance was thrown out of wack in part because of the following:

My complete dedication to my 3 year old
A drastic move from Texas to Alaska
Two 12 month deployments and gearing up for the 3rd
A 10 lb weight gain due to birth control
The lack of sun due to Alaska winters

and a few other small details. Honestly, that's enough to make a grown man's ego cry. There was barely ANY focus on myself. And I don't mean "me" time really. I mean a focus on sense of self. My self esteem had fizzled down to non existing. Sure, at times I felt pretty but more than often I always felt gross. I felt that I started to conform. And if you know me before I had a child, you know I was not a conformer. I was very much an individual. So this was completely unsettling to me. I struggle with depression (let's just put that out there, I'm not ashamed) so any emotion that I feel is always blown out of proportion. I'm sure my situation was not as worse as I believed it to be. Let me just also say that I'm very in tune with my emotions so I could pretty much feel every change going on within me. I just knew I was not myself.

A few weeks ago, this changed. Not just because the sun started to come back (thank goodness) but because I encountered a spark in me. Something that told me that I was just as good and beautiful as I always believed I was. Thank goodness for the people in my life that reconfirm this for me. They know who they are. I will forever be grateful for them & the happiness they give me (no matter how short or long term it is). You need someone in your life to believe in you. That is one of the most important things to getting your sexy back. To getting yourself back. If you don't have one, I will GLADLY be here for you. Just shoot me an email (acupofjenn@gmail.com).

Let me just also say that it REALLY hit me recently that I am only 25. I am still a baby in adult years. I use to think of 25 as almost 30 but now I can't believe how young I still am. Sure I'm married & have a child but I still have the right to a good time. My Aunt told me years ago that I was a 40 year old stuck in a 15 year old's body and I fully believe it. And while I still know that I am an old soul, I do know the importance of being young and enjoying my youth. Life really is TOO short to let my good years go to waste. I hope you know this. If you have your priorities straight, you should never be embarrassed of being young & acting silly. FEEL YOUNG & BE YOUNG because YOU ARE YOUNG. Enjoy your life.

Now that we got that covered, I would like to tell you what helped me to bring my sexy back. It all started when I put on my husbands blue button down shirt while putting on makeup, wearing heels & jamming to Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel." Those of you on twitter might remember that tweet. That was the climax of this journey. All of a sudden out of no where I thought, "Wow, I have great legs. Why did I listen to other people when they would make fun of them? They just wanted my legs." I know that sounds a little egotistical but I took it. After all, I thought my ego disappeared. Then it also hit me that my younger years were kind of horrible for my confidence. The whole time I thought I was confident, someone always tried to bring me down. I started to think that maybe I wasn't as awesome as I thought I was. What a joke. People can be so damn mean if you let them. Especially during the years when you are trying to find yourself!

Anyway, on to the list of things that you could use to bring your sexy back:

A favorite body part to focus on (mine being my thighs & my eyes). If you find something about you that you love, it will more than make up for the flaws you might see. I have one flaw that really bugs the heck out of me (muffin top) but my favorite body parts really make up for it. Show of your favorite parts whenever you have the chance.
Self tanner. I'm not sure why I stopped using self tanner when I moved up here. Everything looks better with a light tan on it. Am I wrong? Don't you just feel better with a little pop of color? I recommend Jergens Natural Glow Daily Moisturizer (for body and face) & Nivea Sun Kissed Beautiful Legs. I apply it until I have a sun kissed glow, not until I'm orange.
Your own signature scent. I have two scents that I have used for YEARS: Love Spell body spray by Victorias Secret & a Paris Hilton perfume in a pink & black bottle. By the way, citrus scents are suppose to be good for your soul so I'd recommend that (which Love Spell smells like Grapefruit in my opinion).
Once a week, wear something that makes you feel GOOD about yourself (mine is posted above). Even if it's a special occasion outfit that you barely get the chance to put on. Even if you don't go out in it. The more you wear things that make you feel good about yourself, the better. And don't feel bad about feeling good in what you are wearing just because other people aren't dressed up. Put yourself in their shoes. They probably wish they looked as dressed up and pretty as you do. Honestly. Wear something that emphasizes what you love about yourself, in this case my thighs.
Make sure you have feel good songs on your MP3 playlist. My songs are E.T - Katy Perry, PYT & The Way You Make Me Feel - Michael Jackson, Good Time - Alan Jackson, Shoot to Thrill - AC/DC. I know, a random collection of music but I really listen to a big genre of music.
Have songs on your MP3 that remind you of where you came from. When you listen to them, they'll remind you of your youth and in return probably make you feel a little spark. I'm not sure if it will work for everyone but it sure does work for me. Here are a few of my songs: La Charanga - Fito Olivares (reminds me of my family), Boondocks - Little Big Town (reminds me of being from the south), A Bay Bay - Hurricane Chris (reminds me of where I grew up). Make sure and blast your songs very loudly and dance like no one is watching.
Wearing a significant others button down t-shirt w/ no pants on. This is just self explanatory. Everyone looks good in their man's button down shirt.

I'd also like to throw in that big TEXAS hair & an awesome eyelash curler are on my list of "sexy back" necessities. If I look a straight up hot mess but have those two things, I feel good no matter what! So if you are out there in a rut & not feeling that great about yourself, please bring your sexy back. It's so important to feel good about yourself because YOU ARE as awesome as you think you are. You ARE as pretty as you think you are. Even without all the makeup, the outfits and everything else you still have your personality. And really, the personality is the CORE of who you are. It is as unique and beautiful as you think it is. Forget what other people say. Listen to what YOU say.

PS. Once you get your sexy back it is necessary you inform your man. You may inform him just by telling him or popping off the "bend & snap." Either way, he needs to be re-informed of how lucky he is.

Breakup Season has started

2011-03-15T16:11:00.005-05:00

Which means the roads are ugly & they are going to get worse. I'm not talking about when the roads melt during the day and freeze at night to make for an extra dose of slipperiness. I'm talking about the gross looking snow on the side. Breakup season brings an ugly sight in town. On the positive side though, it brings warmer weather. Usually, 20+ degrees during the day would be incredibly warm for me. It was last year. But let me tell you it is not this year. I'm still cold. Probably because we've had the same temperatures for an extended amount of time & I'm just irritated. In mid April of last year, it hit 60 degrees. Lets hope it warms up that fast this year because I'm desperate for it. I can honestly say I am straight up tired of the snow & the cold weather. I've kind of had enough. Maybe it's my anxiety about heading back to a warmer state this year but it really makes me grouchy when I look at it. I try to be positive because I do enjoy Alaska but it's such a struggle!

Anyway, with "warmer" weather comes venturing out more. It also comes with eating out more.

and discovering more quirky vehicles floating around Alaska. I really see them every day & think I should start collecting pictures to make its own post! My son screamed when we saw this one. He pulled his glasses down to his nose and stared in amazement. He completely thought his favorite people were in town & we didn't convince him otherwise. You have to let a little tot dream a little!

I can't wait to show you guys the Nemo car. I'm sure everyone who lives here knows what car I'm talking about. Also with warmer weather comes changes. Not only am I on day 3 of doing 20 minutes workouts (actually it's just workouts that mainly target my abdominals) but I am continuing my spring cleaning. After I rearranged my closet (previous post), I kicked my jeans & skirts out of the dresser and gave my underroos a new home. Hubby took me bra shopping this week & I stocked up on the sales that Sears was offering. I also stopped by the PX and picked up a few things as well! As funny as my hubby thinks it is that the bras have its own BIG drawer, I'm sure you girls realize the importance. Oh, and I also got some new bangs!

And no, I don't think it's weird to post my underroos & son in the same picture vicinity. A.) Underroos shouldn't be something to be embarrassed about & B.) He's seen much worse...my literal INSIDES. I think if he stumbles across this picture once he's older he won't laugh at my underwear but rather that his mommy once had an iPhone. It will be as vintage to him as an 8 Track is for me. I bet women won't even be wearing underwear but some sort of plastic saran wrap looking-ish articles for their undergarments. Or probably none at all!

By the way, don't you HATE when you go shoe shopping & find not one, not two, not even THREE but FOUR shoes you love and they don't have your size?! Sure, they were all clearance shoes but HOLY MOLY! They were all by the same brand (Apostrophe for Sears) and all were heels. I need more heels in my life and these were completely ADORABLE. They had ZERO in my size & the one that WAS in my size just felt WAYYY too small. You have no idea how dissapointed I was in the fashion gods. Sure I walked out with a few t shirts but who wants tshirts when there were beautiful shoes waiting for me to buy them? They were 20 dollars a FREAKING PAIR! I should have taken pictures because you guys would have agreed with their gorgeousness. I should have bought them just to display on my shelves.

Anyway, I planned to write something completely different than this but I think I'll save it for this weekend. For now, I'll just throw in some cell phone pictures! (Ps. Do you have Instagram? Add me: ellojenn)

Some things never change...

2011-03-07T22:12:00.002-06:00

I am a slob. There is no doubt about that fact. I will fully admit to my faults, this being one of them. My whole entire LIFE, I have been sloppy. I'm not really sure why but I do know that I have the attention span of a gnat. So if I start to clean & my attention goes elsewhere, that task plummets down to the bottom of the list. And when I say "Don't come over, my house is dirty", it really is. I need at least 5 hours in advance to tidy up before your arrival. Even if you're only over here for 5 seconds! I am definitely a procrastinator. If I'm at my bed on the computer eating something, I'll leave the trash on the side table. Then I'll pile up the trash until it's about to topple over & finally I'll put it in the trash can. And not even the right trash can. More than likely, I put it in the bathroom trashcan instead of walking a few feet downstairs to put it in the main trashcan. I remember paying my sisters to clean my room or make me some ramen noodles in highschool. Lazy!

The plus side of this, however, is that one time on a radio show, it said "Those that tend to have messy spaces believe that there are more important things to be doing. They tend to enjoy life & all the small things. Outgoing, adventurous & kind." I smiled because that sounded EXACTLY like me. There is no making this up. I wish I could find the study the announcer was talking about.

Anyway, the hubby came home this week from NTC, dragged me out of bed and we cleaned up the house. Luckily, this slob married a clean freak. One that cleans the house without being asked and likes things done asap. I, on the other hand, always say "In a minute! The world doesn't run on your time! I have the whole day!" I take a day to clean while he takes an hour. You'd think we'd argue about things like that but we never do. We don't argue too much at all, thank goodness. I still have some laundry to do but my closet looks so much better!

While cleaning my closet, I discovered some oxfords that I got at the thrift store and have never worn. I think I even got them last year or so. I was going to donate them once again until I put them on. I don't even care how geeky they look, oxfords are my new favorite shoe (besides combat boots). Not only are they comfortable but just like glasses, they make you look smarter. Example:

I tried to go out and take an actual decent picture for you guys but it was too late in the day. This means the neighbors are already home & lord knows who would be peaking out their windows while I posed ;) I tried to go to the back area where I use to take a lot of my pictures but these feet would have sunk in the snow. So a crappy mirror picture is all I have for you!

Other than the cleaning, this past week/weekend has been quite enjoyable ;) So far this week, I haven't had my nephew over (because the guys seem to be working half days) & while I enjoy the money, I've enjoyed the break as well. Emery has been doing whatever she wants since her Daddy has been home too. Like laying on my side of the bed as if she owns the place:

Oh and before I forget, I recieved my giveaway prizes this week from Melissa & Kelly. Thanks girls!! I'll post pictures soon. And last but not least, the lie was that I was spit on at a protest. While I did go to the protest, I was not spit on. I was yelled at a few times but never spit on. So that means that YES, my husband and I met on hotornot. Yes, I was a 2nd grade techie & yes, I spent my junior & senior summers training to be a soldier. Did you get it right?!

The Handwriting Game

2011-03-02T22:57:00.001-06:00

I've seen a few bloggers doing this and I wanted to join in on the fun :) All you have to do is take out a pen & paper, answer the following questions and post it to your blog. Here are the questions:

1. What’s your name / blogger name?

2. What’s your blogs URL?

3. Write, “The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog”.

4. Favorite quote?

5. Your favorite song?

6. Your favorite band / singers?

7. Anything else you want to say?

8. Tag 3 bloggers to participate.

If I didn't tag you please feel free to do this! I want to see all of your answers! I like posts that let people see a little bit more about the person behind the blog :)

PS. If you haven't already, check out my previous post and see if you can guess the lie! I'll be posting the answer in the next "real" entry.